"The Ruin of A'agrybah" - CHA'ALT Campaign 4.17

 

We had a "full" table of 4 players today.  

This is the core group that's been around for years at this point.  I will be finding more when we resume the face-to-face Cha'alt campaign going into its 5th year sometime in January of 2027, but for now, 4 is great... even 3 is fine, if someone can't make it, but I could accommodate up to 7 without issue.

Another great and wild session, so let's get into it.  Strum, Bishop Crane, Ug, and Mista Firestorm (though, he has another cactus-folk mobster at the ready for next session).

Picking up where we left off, Strum, Ug, and Firestorm returned to the Moshtobah cave system.  Realizing they never got past the very first cave before being taken to yet another strange dimension, the PCs, reuniting with Crane, buckled down so they could make a real exploration into the last known resting place of Athas' Great Old One, Keelta'anpa'adraj.

Before leaving that original cave, the PCs ransacked the leftovers of that woman's box 'o porn and sexual devices, touching them to the blade of his sword so Orin could absorb the contents into his "blade space."  Orin was happy to have more artifacts of sexual depravity.

The very next cave, the adventurers see an elf painting a bone-white pylon gold with a wide-bristled brush.  They talk to him for a bit, basically trying to understand why... why he was painting it and what was significant about that pylon in particular.

Without having a satisfactory answer, the elf showed the curious PCs inside.  Basically, the only thing inside the black interior (bigger on the inside than outside) was the stone matrix table, its surface covered with all manner of smaller, uniform crystals of concentrated power.  Where ordinary crystals contain the spiritual energy of the Old Gods, pylon crystals are fourth-dimensional nodes making it possible to travel not only through time and space, but dimensions.

Before entering the pylon, however, Ug wanted to paint his magic sword, Orin, with gold... gold being the most gilded of colors.  Orin was also pleased with the fresh coat of paint, no one being the wiser what would happen when Ug wielded him, blazing forth with unparalleled glory!

Carrying on from last session, Mista Firestorm decided to assault the elf with the magic butt-plug.  Prior to that, I told everyone (but this information would probably have come from the sorcerer) that the butt-plug, now that it was no longer in the weird pocket-universe of the cosmic spider, would go back to only working on humanoid females - no one else.  

Nevertheless, the butt-plug was used on the male elf inside the pylon.  I quickly wrote-up a d4 random table to decide how he would react.  Based on the roll, the elf freaked out and kicked over the matrix table while trying to get away.  The crystals spilled-out all over the black floor as the pylon started moving, eventually landing on a cliff, overlooking a desert that contained a ziggurat.

The pylon elf immediately ran for his life, only to be gobbled-up by a T-rex moments later.  The party chatted about whether it was worth the risk to get the butt-plug back out of the dinosaur, and eventually passed on the idea.  Instead, they found stone steps leading down from the cliff to the desert.  They took that and headed over to the ziggurat which was about 500-feet in front of them.  Two guards stood outside the door.

Talking their way past the guards, they entered a large audience chamber containing about 50 people with a raised platform where sorcerer-king Jethryk would soon be preforming his ascension ritual (he was there alongside 4 or 5 other priests and guards waiting in the wings).  

Before I continue, something in Ug changed.  He definitely sounded different.  Now, I surmised that might be due to corrosion in his brain-boost batteries.  But it could also be his magic and sentient sword Orin watching copious amounts of lounge lizard porn in the "blade space" that is his private quarters.  Perhaps by osmosis, Ug unconsciously adopted the effete and degenerate lounge lizard persona.

The PCs checked out the place, walked around, and decided to explore other areas of the ziggurat.  Firestorm found a room painted entirely green, and also a smaller ritual chamber with all the usual stuff, candles, candle holders, tapestries, altar, and a pillar with a demonic jade jaguar atop.

While Strum attuned the jade idol, the others fought off some guards and then a couple of templars who served Jethryk.  The templars wielded magical obsidian blades.  I rolled a couple of crits that brought Firestorm down to sigle-digits and wounded Ug before the PCs took them down.

Now fully attuned, Strum called upon the demon jade jaguar from the ethereal plane while Firestorm looked around to see if there was anything that could either tell them more about the sorcerer-king's ascension ritual or help them defeat him.  I had an idea, and told Firestorm's player to stimulate either the gonzo or pop-culture Cha'alt X-Cards (still one of the best things about Advanced Crimson Dragon Slayer and I would say the entire OSR, if I'm being modest).  In true Beauty and the Beast fashion, one of the candles came to life.  Due to all the residual magic energy in this ritual chamber, I felt it was plausible (plausible for Cha'alt, that is) that a candle could become sentient.

And thus, Luminaire was born, French accent and all.  That green room had a craft services table filled with meats, cheeses, and snacks.  The adventurers bribed Luminaire to help them as the saucy candle scarfed down all the cheese.  

The ethereal jaguar scattered the people, Ug used Luminaire to set the tapestries on fire, Firestorm grabbed Jethryk from the platform with Crane ready to blast fools with his laser.  It took awhile to kill the sorcerer-king, but they eventually accomplished their goal.  Apparently, Orin became even more powerful with the gold paint.  It went from a +2 to a +3, the damage it does is exploding, and when the sword crits an actual explosion of gold flakes covers the opponent.  

Now that the ziggurat was deserted and the fires died out, the PCs finished exploring the structure.  Eventually, they came to a room where a man was painting a transparent (so you could see through it, not inside) pylon a neon-green.  The PCs negotiated a ride in exchange for some strawberry worm-wine and a strawberry fruitie which Crane conjured with his ivory scepter.  

The new pylon man must have bonded with his new fruitie instantly (Crane did a good job of talking-up the idea of having a traveling companion) because he named him Steve (no relation to any player who may or may not be named Steve) and was sad when the strawberry-man was denied him since the pylon pilot input the dimension code with a typo and they found themselves not back on Cha'alt, but the Athas of where they'd just left (again).

Pylon guy brought out something the adventurers had never seen before.  It was a particle churn vacillator, used for identifying coordinates of lost individuals who don't know the official designation of their home dimension or dimensional destination.  While ordinary plane-jumpers use phrases like the puce Cha'alt dimension or electric-banana Cha'alt, both the Guardians of Space, Time, and Reality, as well as, the dimensional navigation guild or DNG use alpha-numeric codes to differentiate places within the skinematic Vengerverse.

Pylon guy said he could eventually take them back to Cha'alt, but he'd need more fuel for the pylon, instructing them to gather crystals.  The PCs know enough not to trust a random "trust me, bro" NPC they get a ride from and chalked that up to "maybe we'll see you around if the stars are right, hoss."

Resigning themself anew to awakening the Great Old One at the end of the yellow brick road, they continued.  Soon coming to a tall, bald, and brawny orange dwarf with assless lizard-skin chaps who was some sort of cult leader and handed out an assortment of strange pills to the compliant community there... and the PCs.  The orange dwarf told them "The sleeper must never awaken!" as he did.  The PCs didn't swallow any of the drugs, but the others did.  Most of them got real sleepy.  

Ug viewed the lizard-skin assless chaps as an afront to his heritage and murdered all the sleepers, even though some of them probably would have died in their sleep, anyway.  Checking their pockets, Strum found a 3-inch transparent cube.

As they were coming up to a crossroads, Mista Firestorm said "Maybe there'll be a demon looking to make a bargain?"  And sure enough, as I pulled a couple of suggestions from the Black Skull of Secrets (I didn't have the players write anything new because the skull is chock-full of weird ideas that we'll probably never get to).  The demon had a face like a warthog and was carrying a big metal book decorated with skulls and bones - a book on necromancy.  

Bishop Crane used Pa'azuk to see into his mind and discovered that he was here to buy a toaster from someone through Craigslist, and was told to meet behind the Walmart.  The PCs looked around, but they didn't see any Walmart.  Just a demon.  And then the PCs kept trying to convince him to part with the book in exchange for a toaster, which the PCs didn't even have... but then it all ended when Crane decapitated the demon via Kaltha'alax.

Moving on, the PCs found another community - this one hopped-up on amphetamines to basically do the opposite of what the first cult wanted to do.  These guys were hoping to awaken Keelta'anpa'adraj, not lullaby him into a drug-induced slumber.  As it happens, the cult on speed was putting on a production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream-Cloak.  Well, it was the people's theater group who were putting it on (just like this).  And that led to an aside from the guy filling the PCs in on what was going on - their cult actually had an amazing technicolor dream-cloak kept inside a plexiglass case.  There were 4 rows of 7 colors towards the bottom of the glass case.  You had to correctly guess the 3 colors.  If you tried to force the plexiglass case open, acid would poor into the case and ruin the dream-cloak.  

Realizing there must be a catch, they started trying.  I've basically used this puzzle-trap many times before.  In the beginning, I used to come up with specific "correct" colors, then I came up with a list of colors and let the random roll of fate decide.  This time, I made it easy on myself and had the players name a color and then I rolled.  I rolled an 8-sided die and if a 4 or 3 or 7 came up, those were the right colors.  If a 1 was rolled, however, something bad would happen.

Two bad things happened on their way to unlocking the case - an eldritch, infernal beast came out of a portal.  Firestorm offered the necromancy book, and the beast took it in its tentacles and then buggered-off back through the portal.  The second thing was the spontaneous creation of a black sphere of utter annihilation.  Everyone (the PCs + the dude they were talking to) rolled a d20 + their level.  Luckily, the guy at the bottom was the cultist and wig-master for Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream-Cloak.  The sphere rushed towards him, utterly annihilating him - but he also burst into a shower of blood.

Apparently, there were at least 3 different variations of teal amongst the buttons.  Shouts of "These rows need more teal!" could be heard across the table to the point where it seemed there was more teal than cowbell.  

Eventually, tangerine, purple, and alabaster gray buttons did the trick, and the plexiglass case opened so the PCs could take out the dream-cloak.  They took a little time to identify just what it did, and I'll put that down here now so that information isn't lost (in case both Ug's player and I lose our notes simultaneously...

Or, so you can steal this idea for your own TTRPG fantasy adventures! 

When worn during REM sleep, the Amazing Technicolor Dream-Cloak can bring one thing from the dreamlands into our waking world.  The dream object may recede back to the dreamlands at any time, but not less than 24 hours.  Every day after the first, a save must be rolled (same as its attuned owner) to keep it here.  Otherwise, it fades away as if t'were waking from a dream.

At that point, we were right up to the edge of our time, and ended the session there.  So, stuck in Dark Sun for another session.  While I have a basic "plan" or concepts of a plan for these sessions, almost anything can happen once play commences.  

Saturday, October 17th should be our next session.  So, hopefully everyone can make it.  Two weeks after that is actual Halloween... will have to talk about scheduling before then.  

While on vacation, I snapped a pic of this game I made while our twin boys, my wife, and I were seated at a table waiting for our food.  It's similar to a game I came up with during our virtual Cha'alt campaign on Wednesday nights (shout-out to Roger, Judd, and Charles).  

Each player comes up with a color, texture, and possibly made-up dance move (in Cha'alt, it's a possibly made-up sexual maneuver), and then either a judge or random number generator picks the winner.

This was a fun one, and we had a lot of laughs.  I jotted down a few amusing sentences from the session for your edification, hoss...

• "No guard should have more than 10 HP."
• "When you're a hammer, everything you see is a butt-plug."
• "Practically all magic items have a sexual preference - they like humanoid women, preferably blonde."
• "Smells like lizard ass in here."
• "Yeah, you're part lizard, part taur."
• "Maybe on Athas metal attracts giant worms?"
• "If everyone had everything, there would be no have-nots."
• "Second-teal is no joke."
• "I guess I'm the one who did the ass-aulting today."
• "Templar union rules - no mopping during rituals, especially shitty water."
• "Hon hon hon, mon amie... let me scarf down the cheesy comestibles and I shall be your arsonist flame."  Or something like that.  I did my best with the French accent.
• "It's not a tight fit.  Orin's blade-space is around 8,000 square feet.  He's got plenty of room for porn, sexual devices, and women."

Thanks for reading, and will catch y'all on the flip-side!  

Just a couple weeks ago, I started putting together a few paid-GM 10-session Cha'alt games via Roll20.  Hoping to see if being a professional GM is a viable option.  

This right here should be my GM profile on there (I had to give them something to call me, pronoun-wise, that wasn't a choice).  If you're interested or know someone who is, reach out, hoss.

VS

p.s. Want some hardcover Cha'alt?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  I've got a virtual Cha'alt campaign for Temple of Violet Demon-Flesh ready to go over at Start Playing, here's the link.  And in even BIGGER news, you can now buy an all-access weekend badge for next June's VENGER CON VI: Belief is Reality convention in Madison, WI right over here.

The Cha'alt X-Card Contest

 

I'm surprising y'all with a contest, motherfucker!

Last night, talking to my wife and eldest daughter about the nature of meta and manifesting one's will into the universe (an aspect of the Living Ultra-Cosmos), I suddenly came upon an idea.  Yes, the contest comes AFTER the revelation.  Sorry, not sorry.

You know that weird veiny, super-colorful flesh pattern that I paint onto the Cha'alt X-Cards?  You can also see a similar pattern at the top of the cover art for the first Cha'alt book.  Well, listen up, hoss, because this is now official canon of Cha'alt - ibrexia is the name of the dimensionally sashaying, hive-minded, thought-form species whose somehow-physical skin adorns the Cha'alt X-Cards we all know and stimulate during our games.  Due to the nature of their strange witch-flesh, such cards have the power to alter reality.

I know what you're thinking (aside from when the fuck will he start talking about the contest), since the Cha'alt X-Cards (free PDF, btw) are game mechanics, why would their appearance be something that exists in the eldritch, gonzo, science-fantasy, post-apocalypse, humor, sleaze, pop-culture, grindhouse exploitation campaign setting?  Because meta... that's all I got for ya.  ;)

Ok, now to the contest (see, that wasn't so bad).  From now until October 1st, if you use the Cha'alt X-Cards in your game - doesn't have to be with either Advanced Crimson Dragon Slayer or Cha'alt - literally any TTRPG and setting, and blog, vlog, or write-up a session report including their use on social media, you will get a free PDF from Kort'thalis Publishing.

That's right, you could incorporate these cards with DCC, MCC, LotFP, Hyperboria, Paranoia, Toon, Call of Cthulhu, Monty Python, Alpha Blue, Encounter Critical, AD&D, B/X, ShadowDark, Deadlands, the Red Room's Wretched New Flesh, etc... pretty much all the games we play at VENGER CON. Part of this contest is to show people that Cha'alt X-Cards can be usable with a lot of different TTRPGs.  The other part is just to get people using them and to showcase their use at a variety of tables.

Additionally, all submitted entries will be in the running for the ultimate, singular prize - a tentacle-made, wooden and painted set of Cha'alt-X-Cards shipped to you anywhere in the world.  This is a little visual taste!  Of course, this set will be weaved with ancient meta-sigil magic of Kort'thalis, shining luridly with the gross, yet enticing flesh of the ibrexia.

How will I determine the winning session report?  My criteria - the most entertaining and fun to read with best showcasing of the cards.

That's all I've got for you today.  Feel free to comment, share, and contribute your awesome content using my innovative and revolutionary Cha'alt X-Cards!  And if I'm wrong, and they suck, then accurately show their sucking in your session report so we can all see for ourselves.  Though, I'm pretty sure they'll improve the overall roleplaying experience. 

Enjoy, and good luck!

VS

p.s. Want some hardcover Cha'alt?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  And in even BIGGER news, you can now buy an all-access weekend badge for next June's VENGER CON VI: Belief is Reality convention in Madison, WI right over here.

No One's Innocent - CHA'ALT Campaign (session 18)

 

Surprise, motherfucker!  We're back in the saddle with another session report...

I was excited about this one because it had been a month since we'd played.  Our regular scheduled gaming intersected with VENGER CON III, and I was running Cha'alt for other folks (plus one of my home game players).

Additionally, the last Cha'alt campaign I ran in 2023 made it to 17 sessions, so this one put us over the top.  So far, this must be the longest continual RPG campaign of my life.  We're gonna keep it going, at least until mid-October when I hope to write and run another investigative horror scenario in the vein of Lovecraft's Cthulhu Mythos.

We had our core 4 + 1 brand-new player who I met at the aforementioned convention 2 weeks ago.  He's also a Wisconsinite and lives an hour and a half north from us.  90 minutes is a crazy trek to come play for 4 hours, so I appreciate his commitment.

Ok, this was a doozy of a session.  Considering everything I just said, I wanted this one to really move the campaign down the line - and it did.  I had a little something special planned that would replace the sleaze factor-5, a game mechanic I wanted to playtest.  Also, we did that thing where if someone rolls the number of sessions we're on, that counts as a critical-success.  18, baby!

Here are the players - Nix the demon-clown thief, Drogon the human sorcerer, Jua'an the crystalline warrior, Gorra the grog priest, and now ST-1X the droid warrior.  I determined that Gorra, who's been fiddling around with technology for the last few sessions finally found an intact droid chassis and enough spare parts to build himself a gigolo Joe.  

One thing I like about not doing 1:1 event timing in campaigns is that I get to pick-up right where we left off.  This isn't always something I do, but when it's dramatically appropriate, it really helps.

As it happens, the PCs at the end of last session commandeered a sky-ship from The Vortex mutants and were heading to the Nameless Plateau.  Gorra flipped a switch, turning ST-1X on.  The PCs were checking their new droid out and getting acquainted (including discussions of what's going on with the simulated world within a world they're in, and how that dude from the previous session seemed convinced that he made all the simulations real and their own separate universes) when ST-1X heard a barely audible chirping noise every 20 seconds or so.

After drawing their attention to it, half the party could hear the intermittent beep and discovered a pair of purple worm-skin driving gloves in the glove compartment (which Nix quickly claimed) along with a high-tech device that had weird symbols, seemingly counting down like in Predator.  Then, a vid-screen turned on and there was a mutant in a pre-recorded transmission, basically admonishing the PCs for coercing a sky-ship out of them.  He was very rude.

The PCs opened the ship's door to throw it out.  I rolled a little d4 table I had ready, and got a 1.  The explosion damaged the ship, forcing them down.  ST-1X grabbed the wheel with his groin-attachment to pilot the sky-ship safely down.  He rolled an 18 - the first of many!

He set it right down on a freshly plowed field.  As they exited the ship, the PCs saw a couple of farmers sitting atop a giant purple worm with a plow attached.  Yes, these were Carcosan redneck purple-men farmers.  As the adventurers know full well, strife has recently befallen the purple-men of the caves.  Not having the other purple-men they needed to give Irro the sorcerer so he could open up a portal to Quorta'ath, the PCs asked if there were any more of them.  Yes, it turns out the farmers had a daughter - Ellie-May, with big tits, blonde hair, and wearing those Daisy Duke short shorts.

In order to prepare for the voyage by purple worm to the Nameless Plateau, Gorra and ST-1X decided to play Turing-test with Ellie-May in the outhouse with a shattered moon cut out of the door.  This happened while the purple-men were disengaging the plow from the worm.

So, thinking about the sleaze-factor during and just after VENGER CON, the exact moment was during our last Inappropriate Characters show with Erik Tenkar (I mentioned a pornographic die-drop table somewhere in the chat).  The idea was to roll a set of 7 dice upon a picture of a beautiful woman in the tongue-out pose I'm sure you've seen on the internet at some point.  This was a die-drop table - closest to the hole determined how many "sleaze points" were acquired.  Those sleaze points can be used to boost any roll for the next 24 hours, but are not transferrable.  

As it happened, both rolls provided Gorra and ST-1X with 9 sleaze points.  Those would come in handy.  Also, I bought some clear with milky-white creamy interior dice just to use with this die-drop table... because I am a colossal pervert!

Having emptied those particular pipes, the creator and created joined-up with the others and they rode that worm off to the Nameless Plateau.  At the plateau's base was a small group of red-men (wearing strange strawberry hats) who were trying to save their precious cargo from some shrieking, radioactive horror attempting to abscond with those crates the red-men were risking their lives to protect.

Jua'an unsheathed his blade of the conqueror and hacked the thing to pieces as it lit up like dried kindling due to the horror's failed save.  The red-men were grateful and gifted Jua'an with both a strawberry beret and a box of their "precious cargo" - a little something labeled Sweet, Sweet Strawberry Douche [an actual made-up product spoken of in a vintage porn scene I stumbled across several days ago].  The girl on the box was wearing one of the promotional hats.  The whole place smelled like strawberries and embarrassment as the PCs rode the worm up the plateau.

Oh yeah, a couple of purple-men met the PCs at the Nameless Plateau because they knew they'd be there, and the adventurers told them it was very important the purple-men showed up at the Nameless Plateau.

At the top, they saw Irro trapped in some kind of zone of dimensional instability.  Then, Jua'an's sword began to tingle, the eye stirred, and everyone heard a telepathic voice.  It said they would have to stop the subterranean demons from using their infernal super-weapon to slaughter everyone on the surface.  Only then would Tsathagg-kha release the sorcerer who would help them enter Quorta'ath. 

A hole opened up in the ground near them and they saw a cave lit by pink crystals.  I'll briefly mention each encounter so this doesn't run too long (a lot happened this session)...

• The PCs acquired pink fuzzy buds from this weed.  Both Gorra and ST-1X partook of the buds.  After about a half-hour, they started seeing eyes everywhere.
• They talked to and bought cheese from a cheese consultant and connoisseur who carried a platter with him full of exotic cheeses.  His name was Jarun.
• Two demons were fighting about how soon to start the invasion.  It just kept going and going, so after 5 minutes they went to explore further.
• They ran into a spherical eye-beast with 2 humanoid slaves - a sexy redhead with amazing rack named Scarlet and a half-demon I didn't bother naming.  The PCs killed the eye-beast and mercifully allowed the slaves to stay on and work for them as barely paid followers.
• They discovered a pool of mutated purple zoth and partook.  One of the side-effects nearly killed them as the entire cave filled-up with a translucent purple goo for 4 minutes.  Some swam through the goo to reach the other side.  ST-1X didn't need to breathe, and Gorra's player stimulated the POP-CULTURE Cha'alt X-Cards which allowed him to take advantage of Scarlet's extra supply of oxygen which can be accessed through her vagina.  Jua'an used the ELDRITCH card to infuse his new glass bones with demonic purple zoth glass as a living skeletal system that was just as eldritch and evil as Tsathagg-kha's eye where his sword's hilt meets the blade.
• Bypassing more demons, the PCs finally found a temple where some ritual to bless the infernal artifact was being held.  Nix did his best to steal the weapon from under their noses, but his terrible rolling only allowed him to grab it and throw it at a demon, killing him.  The artifact was a sort of bladed frisbee that comes back to you after you throw it, sort of like a glaive, but not really. 
• Once Drogon magically put the other demons to sleep, a massive statue to some Devil-God awoke - but the PCs ran the Hell out of there before it could attack.

Top-side again, the PCs bade Irro, now freed by Tsathagg-kha, to open the gateway to Quorta'ath using only 2 purple-men.  Irro agreed, spilling the rednecks' blood as the portal opened unto a world of magenta jelly.  The PCs went through with their entourage (including Irro), sloshing around the slime-desert until they found a stone entrance to some temple.

Entering, the PCs saw two dead humanoids.  They check the bodies - a bar of gold and a laser-pyramid containing some holographic message.  "Great exalted one, we bring you a gift to exchange for the blasphemous glyphs of the night ocean."  Something I found on page 162 of Carcosa.  A particular wall in the cave also contained a message that read "Don't trust him - The Crimson Bastards."

Realizing it must be possible that they themselves left that message at a future date for themselves to find, they put this knowledge on the back-burner while continuing to explore.

The party entered a huge dark cave and Drogon provided a light source which showed a 6-foot by 4-foot stone face of H.P. Lovecraft just sitting on the cave floor.  The PCs tried to skirt around it, but the stone began to crack as monstrous tentacles worked their way through the surface.  Gorra had the bright idea of giving the creature a pink fuzzy bud, some purple zoth, and old-fashioned chartreuse zoth.

This only strengthened the creature, as its tentacles erupted out of HPL's stone face.  Everyone contributed to the fight as the PCs mostly avoided getting hit.  But the half-demon NPC was ripped apart.  The killing blow was dealt by Jua'an as he critted on an 18 after invoking his other self, Zeno.  He rolled so many d6s it looked like a Shadowrun firefight.  He found the creature's brain and stabbed deep down, cracking it open, splintering the skull, and killing the thing.  During the climax, Jua'an was awash in zoth, making them realize this had been some proto-Old One itself or the spawn of such.

Apparently, this was some sort of challenge.  A bloated and festering dolm worm slouched grotesquely upon a massive and obscene altar made of bone and petrified flesh (also from Carcosa, page 162).  Banter bounced back and forth from the intelligent worm to the PCs.  This creature was named Sha'az-Nythub, and he ordered one of his servants to fetch and display the other ultimate weapon the PCs were after upon a silver platter.  

The sentient worm said he was happy to have the PCs owe him a favor, to be collected at his convenience.  

It looked like some weird alien dildo, but the PCs took it anyway.  Just before leaving Sha'az-Nythub, one of the PCs (I think it was Nix) suggested they try the ultimate weapon out before leaving Quorta'ath, in case the bloated and festering worm tricked them.  After all, that message from "The Crimson Bastards" has to mean something.  A couple other PCs agreed.  Only Jua'an seemed convinced that Sha'az-Nythub seemed like an honest bloated and festering worm and must be beyond reproach.  

Before leaving his presence, the PCs tried blasting the worm with the ultimate weapon.  It fizzled, and that was it.  Realizing they'd been tricked.  Nix threw the bladed frisbee boomerang at Sha'az-Nythub.  As it had accumulated power since Nix attuned it, and the glaive-ish artifact had been instrumental in killing the lesser Old One.  

Nix used his sneak-attack which also happened to crit - so he, too, rolled massive amounts of damage, enough to kill the worm outright, sawing it into pieces.  Just before Sha'az-Nythub died, he told them not to look in the furthest alcove.  Of course, they did, seeing the true ultimate weapon sitting on a pedestal.  Since pedestals trump platters, they seized on the opportunity.  

It was a withered hand of a sorcerous demon - that was the ultimate weapon the PCs sought to defeat Isa'ac.  They took it, Jua'an added a footnote to the scrawled message on that cave, letting people know that "Jua'an was here," and asked Irro to make a portal to Cha'alt (basically back to Carcosa but a thousand years in the past).  No sacrifices had to be made because, apparently, Cha'alt is on the main drag, whereas Quorta'ath is way the fuck out there in Bumble-Fuck Egypt.  

The PCs stepped through to greet the familiar fuchsia sky, twin suns, and desert heat.  We ended it there.

I'm exhausted just from typing all that out, but I'm not done yet.  Here are some amusing phrases heard at the table...

• "He was polishing it to completion, just like in the centerfold of Toad Load Monthly."
• "The treat is the flesh it tastes when sinking-in and cutting folks to pieces."
• "Blow 'em sky high with your own supply!"
• "Of course that dildo thing wasn't the real super-weapon.  Pedestal trumps platter."
• "Yes, those redneck purple-men call their worm Jessie."
• "No grain (of sand) left behind."
• [People singing] "Strawberry beret..."
• "Nix healed the banana-ness, not the clownness."
• "Vaginal air filtration system." 
• "Death is our gift."
• And of course, "No one's innocent."

The middle of August is tricky for me because of work, but I'm fairly confident we can play August 17th.  

I didn't get time to finish coloring the sleazy die-drop table, but when I do, I'll show pics.  I could just use images cut out of porn magazines (and probably should have); however, I really wanted to draw a woman on her knees with her tongue out expectantly.

Ok, that's it.  Thanks for reading session report 18 of the 2nd Cha'alt campaign, and thanks again to Evan for joining us.  Let the good times roll!

VS

p.s. There will be a big announcement for VENGER CON IV right around September 1st.  In the meantime, you can still acquire the hardcover Cha'alt books here (it's easy!); I'm also launching a new Kickstarter on Tuesday or Wednesday.  It's for a gonzo guide to gaming.  Check back to this blog for details.

Mysterious Qada'ath [Cha'alt campaign, session 2]

 

There's so much to talk about regarding yesterday's game [two days ago, now, because it took me awhile to find all the art + editing the blog post] - session two of the Mysterious Qada'ath campaign set in the eldritch, gonzo, science-fantasy, post-apocalyptic world of Cha'alt.

5 players, so we had one of our recurring players return for this session, but that still leaves 1 player unavailable due to family commitments.

The incoming player had his choice of classes since all of the 4 core were spoken for.  He decided another warrior would come in handy, and the current droid warrior convinced him to also be a droid... so now the adventuring party looks like this:  two droid warriors (Talis and TX-1138), a demon thief (Nix), pixie-fairy sorcerer (Ha'agly Morningwood), and half-orc priest (Drogan).

An important detail is that TX-1138 was an old Federation droid who'd been reprogramed and broke away from his former masters, eager to start a new life on Cha'alt.

Next, I talked about a small rule modification.  When a lavender moon die of infernal destiny has been rolled, that player may choose to level-up early.  If they do, they get max hit-points instead of rolling their hit-dice.  

Since the pixie-fairy sorcerer, Ha'agly, had used one of his lavender moon dice at the end of last session, he got to jump to level 2 ahead of the others (who would all level up at the end of this session because I just do every other session advancement... no XP, no milestones).

Then, I had everyone roll for their downtime pursuits as per this random table.  Drogan wanted to figure out high-tech healing so he could apply that Federation salve to non-organic lifeforms, like the party's two droid warriors.  Nix wanted to find an alternative way into Qada'ath, other than traversing the orange labyrinth, Talis and Ha'agly wanted to keep tabs on the Federation.  Everyone succeeded.  I took a couple minutes to describe what they'd accomplished since last time we met.

Now, onto the actual game!

The players were in the section of outer settlements where they made Tyrian Purple.  They saw a noble, surrounded by his men and droids sit cross-legged, watching the city... as if he were meditating.  Meanwhile, a midnight-elf woman and her pale female concubine were seductively dancing in the streets.

It turns out that Mistress Midnight and her female friend had sex with the makers of Tyrian Purple, jumping the line when it came to getting what she wanted dyed that particular shade, rather than the noble, Lord Ada'alo.  

The noble invited the PCs to his hover-skiff to discuss business.  He explained his need - his brother would be at the Annunciation where a new King of A'agrybah shall be chosen.  His brother intends to nominate a Federation oligarch.  There's a saying on Cha'alt, "Where A'agrybah goes, so goes Cha'alt."  Lord Ada'alo requires a sash of nobility dyed with Tyrian Purple in order to replace his brother and make his royal nomination.

This is definitely a thread I want to come back to before long.  In fact, it would be hilarious if the whole campaign was geared towards exploring and interacting with the city of Qada'ath... and then the PCs never actually set foot inside it.  Lol.

A couple plans were suggested.  Either get rid of the midnight-elf who wanted her pallid concubine dyed Tyrian Purple, or loot the vault of a dead sorcerer named Tahqeez who was rumored to possess another sash of nobility, just the like the one Lord Ada'alo was trying to have made.

Ada'alo knows the whereabouts and password that will present the vault of Tahqeez, so he planned to take the PCs to the location the next night.  As it happens, this night the assassination droid Talis agreed to work the nightshift at the outer settlement's Quick Stop.  The manager needed someone to find out who was stealing the porn off his magazine rack, and he offered all the Thirst Mutilator 2-liters he and his friends could drink as payment/reward.

Talis and Nix hung out at the Quick Stop while the others went to look for a base of operations in the outer settlements.  They found an abandoned house that was home to a pimp and three of his whores.  Colin stimulated the SLEAZE Cha'alt X-Card, so it was decided that a particular John (bald out-of-town merchant resembling Die Hard 3 era Bruce Willis named France Bacon) was going to be driving by the house very soon, looking for female entertainment.

Eventually, TX-1138 barged in and started blasting.  After trading blows, the pimp ran out of the house.  Texas Instruments followed, trying to shoot him in the back.  He rolled a 1, and a stray shot hit a Federation soldier out on patrol.  The Federation guy shot back, disabling TX-1138.  

Since TX-1138 looked like a Federation droid (and the droid claimed his targeting computer was malfunctioning), they repaired him, fitted him with a restraining bolt, and released him back onto the street.  

Meanwhile, several annoying customers came into the Quick Stop buying random stuff and asking stupid questions.  One interesting fellow came out of nowhere and didn't have any idea where he was... even the planet Cha'alt didn't ring a bell.  His name was Surge Danger Montgomery... and he will appear again sometime soon.

A mantis-folk was skulking back by the magazine rack, so Talis kept a watchful eye on him.  Suddenly, 4 hoodlums jumped out of a black van wearing ski masks and held the convenience store up.  The same player stimulated the GRINDHOUSE EXPLOITATION Cha'alt X-Card, so I described how one of the robbers had a suitcase that opened when it hit the ground after Talis' head-shot.  Inside the suitcase were gold coins, a thermal detonator, and a wallet belonging to Dweezil Jackson with Bad Motherfucker embroidered onto the front.  

Why was one of the robbers carrying such a suitcase?  One of the players asked that, and I didn't have a great answer... but I'm working on something.  Honestly, of all the sessions where we've playtested the Cha'alt X-Cards, this one was the least fruitful, but that's ok.  Not every mechanic (any mechanic?) works beautifully 100% of the time.  Hey, I'll take 90% any day of the week!

Once everything had died down that night, I did a screen-wipe that got us to the hover-skiff of Lord Ada'alo at dusk the next evening.  He took the PCs to one of those stone markers with the eye in the triangle that the PCs had encountered the previous Cha'alt campaign.  

From there, the PCs took the appropriate number and direction of steps and spoke aloud the 3rd moon of Cha'alt.  There appeared the entrance to Tahqeez' vault.  The stone double-doors were etched with a curious seal.  Glyphs on the outer edge spelled out the following (which only the sorcerer could read)...

"The Old Ones, in their infinite wisdom, have blessed us with many wonders, but the greatest of these is zoth."

Eventually, they decided to try splashing some zoth on the seal and it opened.  Inside, the caves and tunnels were dimly lit by tiny crystals covering the walls, floor, and ceiling of this subterranean vault.

From there, the PCs fought a few skeletons, giant scorpions, Nix got some alone time with a demon girl bathing in a pool of black liquid (securing for himself the high-five bonus), and they encountered an almost identical seal, but instead of the final glyph being zoth, it was "vyzvra'akna" which means unutterable darkness, frequently translated as cosmic horror.  Wisely, they decided against activating this seal.

The PCs found a brain in a jar attached to a spider droid.  This was Gerald whose body had been burned away by the sorcerer whom he served.  Gerald explained that the dead sorcerer Tahqeez had become a lich.  In exchange for the promise to help him find a new body, Gerald told them the lich's weakness.  

Finally, the adventurers bypassed a trap and ignored some strange shadows before reaching the jeweled sarcophagus of Tahqeez the sorcerer.  They opened the lid and saw the dead sorcerer.  Nix tried to yank its Tyrian Purple death-shroud, but the lich held on and then swung his magical sword wreathed in black flame.

I really should have made that last room either a bit deadlier (with additional monsters and such) or prepared with gizmos to deactivate high-technology.  A few shots of laser (I think both warrior droids had a critical hit) and Drago using one of his lavender moon dice to really spectral-blast the shit out of Tahqeez, the lich didn't last more than 2 rounds.

Once vanquished, the PCs recovered the loot that was there and even found a hidden compartment that contained a scroll - it was an explanation of that other seal with an invoice paperclipped to it for 1,000 gold pieces that was never paid.  Colin joked that the lich probably intended to "outlive" the seal maker and so he didn't have to pay.

That other seal, the "cosmic horror" one would have triggered a TPK if they'd splashed zoth upon it, shadow tentacles erupting throughout the vault, tearing everything alive to bloody shreds.  So, good thing the PCs avoided it.

The PCs really searched all over the place for that sash of nobility dyed Tyrian Purple, but all there was in that hue was the lich's death-shroud.  So, they gave their patron, Lord Ada'alo that, and kept the rest for themselves (in addition to each earning 36 zuleks from Ada'alo himself.  He acquired them from some recent off-world adventure)...

• The lich's magical sword named Zorvra'an, which means black flame.  It does 2d6+1 damage (on a crit the sword does an additional 1d6 damage of obsidian fire that can only be put out by some sort of dispel magic or anti-magic field.
• A Ring of Power +1 that grants the wearer a +1 to all their rolls (assuming the character wants it).
• Elsewhere in the vault, the pixie-fairy scored a prismatic crystalline scepter (I've got a general idea about what it can do, but will save that for next game).  
• 7 Lich sarcophagus gems 
• The aforementioned 36 x 5 zuleks
• TX-1138 started using an ivory demon's horn javelin +1 that had skewered him during the skeleton warrior attack.  If it wounds someone who survives, that wound becomes a little demon.  Since TX-1138 is a droid, I thought it appropriate to turn his wound into a little mechanical demon - will have to feature that next session as it'll be fully grown by then.

The hover-skiff took the PCs back to their whore house headquarters and they made plans before trying to find their way into Qada'ath next session...

Drogan wanted to talk to the Gods about his new power ring, Nix wants to find out more about Tyrian Purple, Talis wants to establish/remodel their "whore base," Morningwood is going to sweet talk Dante (manager of the Quick Stop) so he spills the beans about getting into the city, and TX-1138 was hoping to do some diagnostics on his targeting computer (I should have asked him about that since I'm not sure what he meant... we had just wrapped everything else up and I got distracted by parting words, blowing out the ceremonial candle, scribbling the last of my notes for that session, etc.

Oh yeah, the pixie-fairy's player texted me after the game to say they'd forgotten about Gerald, but he wanted to go back and recover the brain in the jar.  They never ended up using the lich's weakness since they had enough raw (and enhanced) firepower.

Colin prefers non-dungeon adventures, and he'll get his wish soon.  The intrepid adventures (they're still working out a group name for themselves) should reach Qada'ath by the 2nd half of next session... probably.  From then on, it'll be a series of urban-crawl sandbox shenanigans and Shadowrun type scenarios.  But I'll still adhere to the three pillars of exploration, social interaction, and combat. 

Because of the impending Christmas holiday, the next session will actually be this Saturday, December 16th... and then we'll be back again on Saturday, December 30th.

Thanks for reading, hoss!

VS

p.s. I've got hardcover Cha'alt books for sale - details here!  And now's the time to get your weekend badge for VENGER CON III: Revenge of the OSR - check out the convention page!

Cha'alt X-Cards

 

Cha'alt X-Cards have arrived!!!

The idea happened, we playtested it, and now it's a thing on DriveThru (for FREE)...

Here's the PDF on DriveThruRPG.

As a friend on Facebook said, instead of "No spiders," it's more like "More sleaze, please!"

Imagine empowering players to make the game more awesome just by holding up a card - without disempowering the Game Master.  

This is a way of creating Cha'altian sessions that could all too easily revert back to vanilla D&D.  I know... I created Cha'alt and even my imagination sometimes falls back into the comfortable rut of standard fantasy tropes.

And remember, you don't have to use Cha'alt itself to benefit from those Cha'altian vibes.  Use Cha'alt X-Cards with Lamentations of the Flame Princess, Dungeon Crawl Classics, Neon Lords of the Toxic Wasteland, or any game that values eldritch, gonzo, science-fantasy, post-apocalypse, humor, sleaze, pop-culture, and grindhouse exploitation!

In my estimation, this is even bigger than forever improving D&D combat with Crimson Escalation... this is a concept that takes the hobby of roleplaying games in exciting and new directions.  

Fiction first... for real!

It's a free PDF, so I hope you give it a try.  I'm currently busy custom-making Cha'alt X-Cards for friends, fans, and supporters of my work.

Enjoy,

VS

p.s. Cha'alt hardcovers are here.  Details and weekend badges for VENGER CON III: Revenge of the OSR are here.  And if you want a tentacle-made set of Cha'alt X-Cards by yours truly, paper is $15 and wood is $20 + $5 for shipping for one or multiple sets:  Venger.Satanis@yahoo.com

"Prophecy Mine" [Cha'alt one-shot session report]

 

I'm so glad that I ended my Crystals of Chaos, 9-month and 17-session Cha'alt campaign before leaving for vacation.  After 3 weeks, I come back to only two players being available... which wouldn't have worked.  And not sure about next week, either, but I'm going to schedule a session.

Between inertia and analysis paralysis, I chose to run more Cha'alt, which upon reflection, just seems stupid.  That's like being on a cheesecake diet for most of the year and then when you're off the diet, you decide to eat cheesecake.

I mean, there's literally dozens of RPGs I own that I could have run, that I probably should have run.  On the other hand, I do love cheesecake... and Cha'alt.  So, here we are.  Another Cha'alt one-shot, but this time in-person (as opposed to the virtual one-shots I run once or twice a month on Roll20).

Oh yeah, a small but deciding factor was my custom, hand-made Cha'alt X-Cards [YouTube video showing all 8 of the finished cards] which would be finished by game time (Saturday afternoon).  We ended up only using 2 of the 8, but that playtest experiment was fruitful, as I believe you will see by the end of this session report.

Ok, my two players started the session with new 3rd level characters - Nix the salty and crusty, chaotic, ambidextrous demon thief and Ha'arumph the half-orc, also chaotic, always positive but a bit dim warrior with a giant spoon-shaped weapon named Soulnier the Castrator in which Ha'arumph can project his smoldering, volcanic intensity.  Once the half-orc's player, Steve, started voicing the character, I saw him as an orcish Simple Jack from one of my favorite comedies, Tropic Thunder!

Both PCs lived in Kra'adumek and had been day laborers, recently promoted to troubleshooters by the Purple Priests of that city-state.  This halfling with a gimpy leg ushered them to the Great Temple where they were blessed and told of their mission - explore an old crystal mine.  All the crystals were gone, but signs and portents indicated that something strange may be happening in the caves and tunnels of that old mine.  

While in the temple of the Purple Priests, they noticed a "holy water" font filled with zoth and a familiar saying carved just below one of many Lovecraftian Gods - "Where there's fuchsia, chartreuse cannot be far behind."  This is something the PCs had heard throughout their lives.

The adventurers hired a couple of reptilian riding spiders which cut their time in half.  I don't roll for it often, but decided to check and see if the Fuchsia Putrescence (borrowed and slightly altered from The Islands of Purple-Haunted Putrescence) would be seen overhead.  Sure enough, it was.  

The PCs narrowly avoided getting scooped up by a tentacle and devoured by the gargantuan floating thing above.

Shortly after, they made it to the mouth of the cave.  It soon forked, and the thief scouted ahead, noticing 3 humanoids who were using advanced technology (a sort of ultra-vibrational tuning fork device) to pry a particularly large and hard to get at purple crystal from the wall.  

Just before the PCs made their presence known, everyone heard a female cry for help coming from the other tunnel.  The PCs hid, hoping the humanoids would pass by without noticing them.  Sure enough (since I rolled a 1 for the NPCs' perception check), they didn't see shit.

That's when the PCs decided to dig that ostrich-egg sized purple crystal the rest of the way out, using the warrior's sharpened spoon weapon that he could heat up.  It eventually popped out just as they heard even more insistent screams from a woman.

Taking the crystal with them, the PCs checked it out.  They found a woman stuck halfway in a smaller tunnel.  And the 3 humanoids had pulled the female's pants down (she was still wearing her underwear) and who knows what would have transpired if not for their timely intervention.

With a quip and flashing blades, the battle commenced.  Wounds were taken on each side, but Nix and Ha'arumph easily prevailed.  Then, they unstuck the woman and got to hear what she was about... a recently escaped slave who noticed a glowing banana about 9-feet inside a smaller tunnel.

Using the smaller Nix and the spoon weapon, they fished out a novelty, banana-shaped crystal rimmed jaccard.  Nix took that, being a thief [it's so unbelievably useful that a crystal rimmed jaccard grants the thief using it Advantage when employing the tools of his trade], and gave the woman, Parev, the 40 talons they took off the dead NPCs.  Parev wanted to join their little band, hoping strength in numbers would allow her to survive.

On their way to check out her screams, the PCs had bypassed another tunnel to the north.  So, they backtracked to see what was down there.  A slumbering creature covered in tentacles!  They left it alone, proceeding to other areas.

They found a pool of zoth with several humanoids (the slavers who Parev escaped from, in fact) around it.  The leader, Blood Beard, about to plunge his sword into the zoth in order to enchant it with ichor of the Great Old Ones.  The PCs went in another direction before engaging with them.  They found a petrified worm and just around the corner two braziers making the entire area fragrant with peach incense.  That system of tunnels and caves terminated with a fuchsia door. 

Nix and Ha'arumph spent a decent amount of time on that door, trying various ways to open it.  Some techniques were so ingenious, I almost caved, but there was a specific way of getting that fuchsia door open.

Eventually, they guessed... or at least assumed that zoth might open the fuchsia door.  Not wanting a direct confrontation with the humanoids in the zoth pool cave, they devised a plan.  One of them would lure the humanoids out, and the other would draw the sleeping Lovecraftian creature down the tunnel so the two would intersect.  

I had each PC roll a d6.  If a 1 was rolled, their plan would breakdown at some point leading to potential disaster.  Steve, usually the worst roller at our table, did not disappoint.  He rolled a 1, but I reminded him that if he tapped one of the Cha'alt X-Cards, that would yield a point of Divine Favor so he could re-roll.  He pulled the eldritch card, and rolled a 3 to counteract the critical failure.

I described how the sleeping tentacled thing's psionic-shadow rose and followed him as the half-orc attempted to mind-meld with it. Then, as planned, the two factions made contact.  I wasn't sure how to adjudicate the battle between mythos spawn and NPC slavers; so, I had each player roll a d20.  Nix's player rolled slightly higher.  I described the head-slaver, Blood Beard, as the sole survivor, withdrawing his glowing magical blade from the shadow thing.

It only took a couple rounds for the PCs to dispatch Blood Beard, since he had been wounded by the creature.  Then, they looted the bodies.  Aside from some gold and a set of miniature thieves tools, there was a cerulean ring, it's jewel dancing in the faint light of torches and mystic crystals.  The PCs didn't have a sorcerer, nor time to discover it's magical nature, but it makes water taste like fine worm wine to the ring-wearer.

Having the overgrown spoon weapon dripping with zoth, Ha'arumph hit the fuchsia door again, and this time zoth droplets were visibly absorbed into the door, it shimmered, and opened.  Inside, all was blackness.  

They walked through and found themselves exiting a nearly identical door into a nearly identical cave which they'd just left.  However, this door was chartreuse.  And instead of peach incense, the braziers issued a citrus lemon-lime fragrance.  Oh, and the petrified sandworm was no longer petrified.  Wisely, the PCs decided to creep past it with ludicrous success - to the point where we all speculated if the worm might be blind.

Realizing this was some kind of parallel universe, the adventures retread their steps to see what else was different.  Their first inclination was to see if another crystal was there.  It was, but this time, it was a fuchsia crystal.  So, they liberated that and kept going north to find a couple of cultists guarding a malevolent entity summoned by their High Priest.  For now, the monstrous demonic creature was trapped inside a magic circle.

Nix and Ha'arumph surprised the cultists, but had difficulty finishing them off, mostly due to Steve's infamously terrible rolling.  I suggested maybe drawing another Cha'alt X-Card from the pile, and he obliged.  This time he drew sleaze and described how Ha'arumph quickly stripped Parev's clothes and pushed her into the cultist - who was so shocked that he involuntarily grabbed her naked breasts and proceeded to motorboat them as the half-orc warrior hacked into him from behind.

Not wanting to be left out of the sleaze-making, I described how the summoned creature's tentacle went through the backside of a distracted cultist standing near it... into his ass and out his mouth.  It took a round to shake the dead cultist from its tentacle.  If Colin had been there, I know I could have wrangled a "gross" out of him.  ;)

Realizing how formidable the summoned creature probably was, the PCs made an expeditious retreat.  The cultists pursued the PCs all the way back to the chartreuse door... where the sandworm was waiting.  They discretely snuck past (they originally rolled so well - two natural 20s and a 19, so I had no problem letting them sidestep the worm).  However, the High Priest and his cultist companion weren't so fortunate.  The sandworm ate the High Priest and I believe Ha'arumph decapitated the cultist.  

Oh yeah, either just before or during the PCs' retreat, the half-orc used the purple and fuchsia crystals to mind-meld with the demonic thing trying to break out of the magic circle.  Steve rolled a 19 (in 17 sessions, no one had ever seen him roll anything higher than that), so not only did he repel the demon's psychic force (that I was fully prepared to let a disastrous roll crush the half-orc's already simple mind), but also glean an insight as to how they might get home, in case it wasn't obvious.

By now, I would hope that several of you might have guessed the solution - hold the fuchsia crystal up to the chartreuse door.  That's what the half-orc did, and the door opened, allowing them to return to their own universe.

Getting back and being "home free" was pretty much the ending.  I didn't have anything beyond that planned.  We got a late start, so that was a three-hour session.

Delving into the Cha'alt X-Cards some more, instead of earning a point of Divine Favor (which appeared from that session's vantage point to be "the middle man")... the end result was diverting failure into a more prosperous direction.  Both times Steve played a Cha'alt card, he attempted to turn a bad roll (or result) around.  As it should be.  Sure, an anti-climax may be possible, but shouldn't that be the exception, not the rule (all things being equal, at 3rd level, most straight-up rolls are 50/50).  

Essentially, if we decided to continue along that route (doing away with the Divine Favor's re-roll), the "cost" of finding a silver lining to the current situation's cloud was coming up with a way to make the game more eldritch, sleazy, etc.  

After all, what is Divine Favor if not the gods of Cha'alt nudging reality in a way that's favorable to the adventurer implementing it?  Since I, as Game Master, step-in to the role of Cha'alt gods, it's ultimately up to me to decide just how much help to give the PCs and what that looks like when the smoke clears.

Just the way it was organically used in the session took Cha'alt X-Cards in that direction.  I'm excited to see what happens the next time we use them.  Now that I'm aware of that possibility, I'd be happy to forgo Divine Favor (and the resultant re-roll) instead of offering a celestial offramp that mitigates whatever failure that PC is currently wallowing in.

Basically, what I'm trying to say (at least partly) is that even if a Divine Favor reroll was unsuccessful, an aspect of my GMness feels bound to give the PC a leg-up.  And if that's the case, then the Divine Favor is rather superfluous.  It may not be what the PC or player intended, but something good will no doubt come from altering the fabric of reality via Cha'alt card narrative influence.

Hey, at least I'm consciously aware of my bias.  Favoritism, like privilege, isn't a dirty word.  And neither is "design."  As in, this is the way I've designed my game, my adventure, my campaign, the way I Game Master.  It's tailored to my specifications.

I feel like so many GMs are pushed and pulled, swayed this way and that by their unconscious mind... unaware of why they make the rulings they do.  Oh sure, we all have dice to fall back on, but if I may quote another favorite movie John Carpenter's Prince of Darkness... "He lives in the smallest parts of it.  In the atoms... smaller... invisible... he lives in all of it."

By that I mean, even with clearly defined parameters and success or failure determined by rolling, the GM has too much power, too much control to remain absolutely neutral.  Over time, absolute neutrality is an impossibility.  

In fact, I would caution GMs from clinging to the falsehood of neutrality in favor of consciously helping to create the type of experience they'd like to see.  We're not the sole author (don't forget the players are there, too).  However, it is our story.  In this case, I feel the need to clarify that "our" means GMs take an active part in it, and are most likely the prime creator - but that doesn't mean the GM owns it fully or that other narrative contributions are meaningless.

Did someone say PSYCHOCOSM?!?

Even though I would have liked a break from Cha'alt, I'm happy we went back there, into that world.  But I can almost guarantee that the next time we play, it'll be a different game.  No matter how much I love cheesecake, I still crave other desserts - and this week, it's apple-cider donuts!

Thanks for reading,

VS

p.s. Do you have your weekend badge for VENGER CON III: Revenge of the OSR yet?  If not, don't wait.  You do NOT want to miss an entire weekend of non-woke gaming with some of the most outrageous, controversial, and awesome gamers in the hobby today!  Additionally, I've still got Cha'alt hardcovers for sale - details right over here.

Cha'alt X-Card Trilogy Deal

 

Ok, here's the deal.  I need to get more hardcover Cha'alt books sold before Kickstarting Book 4 of the trilogy in January.

I also want to get my Cha'alt X-Cards into the hands and tentacles of gamers like you.  What are Cha'alt X-Cards, you ask?  A set of 8 cards, each with a different descriptor that comprise the greatest campaign setting ever made... CHA'ALT.  

It's eldritch, gonzo, science-fantasy, post-apocalypse, sleaze, humor, pop-culture references, and exploitation / grindhouse (added later, after the initial pictures were taken).

At any point in the session, a player can grab a card from the middle of the table and raise it up, letting the GM know he should incorporate a bit (or perhaps a lot) more of whatever is on the card into the current encounter, scene, moment, whatever.

EDIT: And the player who tapped the card gets a point of Divine Favor (or your metacurrency of choice) as a reward (incentivize the play you want to see more of).

So, that prisoner exchange the GM is describing suddenly becomes tinged with alienage and cosmic horror, assuming the eldritch card was tapped. Does that one convict tweaking-out have forbidden knowledge locked inside his subconscious - about to rip and tear its way out like a thousand screaming tentacles?

You see what I did there?  I just came up with that secret subplot just now, thanks to the Cha'alt X-Card prompt.  And players are encouraged to come up with their own inspirational ideas when they raise a particular card... subject to the GM's capricious whims, of course.

Anyways, I made myself a set of Cha'alt X-Cards and got to try them out.  They worked even better than expected, so now I want YOU to have your own set... and it gets even better - I'm going to handmake these 8-card sets so that you'll have custom Cha'alt X-Cards of your very own.  They'll be colorful and weird and probably low-fi art-punk as Hell.  I'm going to try a bunch of different things and let folks pick out their favorite (subject to availability).

The ones you see here on this blog post were the original prototypes.  I can and shall do better.  I'm hoping these will be cherished artifacts for years and years to come, used in various games (both Cha'alt and non-Cha'alt), and one day as ebay worthy as one of Banksy's public murals.

So, how do you get your set of 8 uniquely custom Cha'alt X-Cards?  Purchase the full trilogy of hardcover Cha'alt books at some point this month, in September, and then before the end of October, I'll mail out the Cha'alt X-Cards (you'll get the actual books days after your order).  I can't send them together because 1) I have to design and physically make them, which takes time... and 2) If I tried to send the cards along with the books, I'd lose the "media mail" discount on domestic shipping.

Speaking of which, this deal - a set of free Cha'alt X-Cards - is only good for those living in the USA.  For those living outside the USA, I can send you a set of Cha'alt X-Cards for an additional $20.

For the entire, professionally printed, gorgeous hardcover trilogy of books (that also come with the PDFs if you don't already have them), it's $130 domestic ($200 foreign).  Paypal me at: Venger.Satanis@yahoo.com

Got a question?  Just ask...

VS

p.s. I'm currently selling weekend badges for my midwest gaming convention VENGER CON III: Revenge of the OSR.  You should go, hoss!