"The Ruin of A'agrybah" - CHA'ALT Campaign 4.4

 

As I said on X later that evening, after our session had concluded, "This afternoon's face-to-face Cha'alt session was so fucking Cha'alt... it was almost too Cha'alt for comfort."

So many little details are about to hit the cutting room floor.  All I can do is try to snatch them up and paste them on the wall before they're gone forever, save our struggling recollection.  Here goes nothing!

We had 4 players: Strum the terrible, sorcerer human; Deacon Elijah Crane, human priest; Ug Esquire, lizardtaur warrior; and The Nefarious Naza'akhul, human thief (a fresh PC, though same player who played Lanar the pixie-fairy thief the last time he joined us - Naza'akhul is an arch-enemy of the Federation who enjoys pranking and harassing them.

As has become a tradition at our table, I cut small pieces of paper and handed one to each player so he could make a "black skull suggestion" that I would randomly pull, improvise, and award a point of divine favor to the player who wrote it.

I also told my players that if they came up with 2 new personal goals, they'd get a point of divine favor for their effort...

Strum's was improve playing the ukeleli, finding sheet music or instruction videos, etc.  And his second was to find a mentor for either magical or musical improvement.  

Deacon's was to enlighten the natives and escape Cha'alt.  Both motivations already baked-into his character concept from the get-go, but this time formalized (written down and spoken) which, I feel, solidifies them into the game and makes going after and achieving those goals increasingly possible.

Ug's was to learn a new word (perhaps swear or rude words) and obtain new books.  Also, he wanted to avoid killing an antagonist.  This is a softer side of Ug, which we all thought was an interesting development.  Incidentally, the word that Ug learned this session was "tumescent."  And that eventually became the word of the day, a la PeeWee's Playhouse.

Naza'akhul chose arching more, as his character concept is to be an over-the-top nemesis to lots of folks he meets.  Also, invoking fear.

Just to make things easier, the players bedded-down in a nearby cave, getting some rest while also switching out PCs in the adventuring party.  I had Strum and Ug roll dice to discover what was up with the appreciative sex slaves they rescued last session.  Not having a thorough random table on-hand, I made one up on the spot.  Ug was fine on both counts, but Strum's current main squeeze was mildly upset with him, and also gave him an STD.  He discovered this when it burned when he peed.

That led to confession time with Deacon Elijah Crane who is, after all, a priest of the Lords of Light.  In return for asking forgiveness, as much as a Cha'alt native is able, Strum was healed of the burning sensation.

As the PCs were getting ready to leave, they noticed a glimpse of green dart in and back out of the cave.  Ug went after it down the tunnel, and eventually came face-to-face with the leprechaun Saint Sa'al (I asked the players to help name him... and I did not expect someone to come up with "Saul," but that reminded us of Better Call Saul, and with Ug's penchant for lawyering (even though he barely knows what that means) and some help from another player, I decided to blend the accent to come up with "Oi vey, I know ye be after me lucky charms!"

Towards the end of this lengthy interaction, Ug was pleased with himself for not simply skewering this little green fellow when he had the chance (personal growth! But his sword, Orin, was irritated that he paused an X-rated version of Bewitched with two Samanthas going at it when there was no violence to be had - "Now, I've gotta start all over!").  Strum was mildly disappointed (but also probably a bit relieved) when St. Sa'al replied that he could not mentor the sorcerer in the ways of magic.  Nevertheless, the leprechaun gave away a handful of something called rainbow, apparently a drug that looked suspiciously like skittles.  

Not sure if they should try it, their dark-elf slave Grenthal volunteered.  Periodically, as time passed, he would talk about how green everything looked, almost as if the color was alive.  There was a euphoric feeling, as well.  Later, he was asked if the lime-flavored candy drug affected how he tasted other things, and he replied that everything had a lime sort of green taste.  The PCs were taken aback when Grenthal put his fingers in his mouth and withdrew them, showing that the tips of his fingers had become green merely from his saliva.

Soon after, the PCs went into a cave filled with coral growths.  One particularly large and monstrous area of coral was being worshiped by a middle-aged man who soon introduced himself as Bendu A'alabin.  But that was after Naza'akhul attempted to throw his voice and impersonate the Great Old One that Bendu thought he was speaking to.  "Ona'ak-Maya'az, is that you?"

There was some theological discussion between the Deacon and this self-styled priest who desired to become the Qua'ah-Xa'an of the Dark God.  That title is more of a private secretary than public-facing High Priest, but an important position nonetheless.  

Before leaving the coral cave, one of them noticed a metal grate on the ceiling, about 8-feet high.  Ug climbed up there to see what was going on, removed the grate and put his head into a 1-foot around tunnel that was obviously too small for any of the PCs.  It felt humid and there were little puddles of water in the tunnel, as well.  In the end, Bendu decided to accompany the adventurers because it is dangerous to go alone. 

The big combat of the afternoon came soon after (Orin was pleased), as they discovered mushrooms lining the tunnel that led to a small cave filled with even bigger mushrooms, and eventually a massive cavern containing a gigantic mushroom monster.  But before the PCs encountered that guy, the medium-sized fungi spored them purple stuff.  It got on their clothes, eating almost all of Deacon's robes so he looked like he was wearing shorts and a t-shirt.  Ug's human-skin vest also disintegrated, and his skin soon took on a purplish tone.

The battle lasted about 4 rounds with a couple of crits on both sides.  Ug's magic sword, Orin, was still enhanced by the zoth from the previous session, and did his best to cut the giant mushroom down as Deacon blasted it, Strum hit it with magic missiles, and Naza'akhul poked it from down below in the creature's taint area - thus was he nicknamed "taint poker."  Strum went down halfway through the battle, and Ug was hit hard... so was Grenthal.  But they all healed up eventually and realized how hungry they were.  Oh yeah, also halfway through the battle, the PCs noticed some guy dressed like a librarian walking by the entrance to the mushroom cave carrying cheese slices.  The PCs cut up the dead giant mushroom, found some cheese slices just laying on a flat-topped stalagmite and cooked them up.  Cheese found in caves becomes saturated with the natural juices of Cha'alt, also known as 2nd hand cheese or cheese-of-the-cave.

Before leaving, the PCs also looted the mushroom cave.  This is what they found... Spank Magazine (issue #53), Last Days of Freedom (issue #1 of that zine by Black Pyramid Publishing), a dagger +1, a canteen full of zoth, a hologram instruction for the mandolin (which Strum would try to repurpose for his ukulele), 67 gold pieces, and a wand of lightning (12 charges).

I had the PCs roll a d8 to determine how this dish agreed with them.  Results varied between the best meal they've ever had all the way down it barely agreed with them.

A little while later, the PCs remembered that St. Sa'al told them that if they ever wanted to get ahold of him, to simply call out his name.  Strum did just that, and the leprechaun came.  Strum told him that he wanted to buy more rainbow, but his gold was up in that tunnel, and if he could just scurry through the tunnel and find it, the party's sorcerer could pay him.

Believing this, Saint Sa'al made his way up into the grate and crawled into the tunnel.  In the meantime, while the PCs were waiting, I decided to feel around the inside of my black skull and pulled out a suggestion.  It was from Deacon's player again, Lol.  This time, the suggestion was for them to happen upon the Golden Girls all hopped-up on spanish fly.  A lot of inappropriate solicitation by Blanche followed, but none of the PCs were interested in 70-year-old pussy.

Eventually, St. Sa'al came back with a shining tetrahedron.  Strum, continuing the ruse, tried to open it in order to pay the leprechaun for his drugs, but the only thing he managed to find was a button that dispensed Cha'altian butter - so creamy, so salty!  Instead, Strum offered him that orange crystal he'd been carrying around - to which Sa'al said yes, and then gave him another 7 pieces of rainbow.

A new cave, a new mystery... this area contained a wardrobe that backed-up to a rough-hewn wall.  Ug and then Deacon (he needed new clothes after the purple spore disintegration, and even Ug found some yellow slacks to go with the purple corduroy bedazzled assless chaps which he acquired from the giant mushroom's loot) opened up the wardrobe and went inside.  Realizing that it just kept going, they went in farther and farther until coming out the other side into a well-appointed, and sweetly perfumed room that looked like inside the lamp from the vintage TV show "I Dream of Jeanie."  The only thing of obvious value was a sculpture of an intertwined couple making love, the man was fashioned out of chartreuse and the woman fuchsia.  Deacon slipped that into his satchel (dead man's clothes are the ultimate separation buffer between an adventurer's valuables).  

At this point, the PCs could hear people talking in the next room.  I played a handful of seconds from this old-school porno called Babyface (1977) starting at the 2:30 mark.  Basically, the madam of this stud-brothel was giving a new guy the low-down about what's expected at Karininina's pleasure spa where women can go and experience the sensual pleasures of a man who still has his junk intact.  Ug did what he does best and just lumbered into the room, causing confusion but eventually being taken into the back by Sally for brothel-stud grooming himself.

Then, some of the women and men went into the room where the PCs were and attempted to talk their way out of being there.  They soon realized this place was in the matriarchal city-state of Ja'alette where the vast majority of males were eunuchs.  Besides that fuchsia and chartreuse sculpture, the only loot they got was the curtains and a hot-pink throw-pillow.

Back in the cave again, they saw a humanoid who stood right outside the wardrobe.  This was Resha'ad, and he was interested in finding a position within the Great Old One priesthood hierarchy, even if it meant becoming an apprentice.  Bendu took to Resha'ad, agreeing to take him on as an apprentice.  It was then, seeing them together, where the PCs made the connection.  These were the exact same two ja'abronis who were in that cave a couple sessions ago, the one isolated in time and space where that guy was selling tickets to see that event, Resha'ad's betrayal, over and over again.

Deacon tried to warn Bendu, but the Qua'ah-Xa'an hopeful wasn't sure if he should believe him, knowing how the Federation priest regarded the "worship of monsters and moral abomination" that was the Cha'alt religious experience.  Confronting his new apprentice did not alleviate concern.  Someone suggested that Resha'ad should take a piece of rainbow and then everyone could see if the truth would come out during his altered state.  Resha'ad agreed and took the yellow one.

Soon enough, he was going on about the yellowness of this new euphoric universe in which he was trapped.  The PCs asked questions and Resha'ad mentioned how he was biding his time, waiting for the right time to strike against the Old Ones.  At this point, Bendu had heard enough and stabbed Resha'ad over and over again with his dagger.  His former apprentice's blood was yellow (crazy!), and soon died.  Bendu wasn't giving up his worship of Ona'ak-Maya'az, but showed a newfound respect for the Lords of Light, and told Deacon that, and that he owed him one.

Before the next thing, Deacon's wrist communicator beeped an alert.  Messages popped onto the screen telling him about tomorrow night's festival and the royal garden party called a Night of Too Many Tentacles that Deacon was invited to, and the Federation warning him that he was summoned to the following night's saba'ath, where it's possible he'd be sacrificed, but not likely... however, skipping the saba'ath was not an option.

Heading back, the PCs had to circumvent that giant, monstrous crab again in order to find the entrance / exit (at which point, Strum was surprised and annoyed that the way out of here was known all along - he assumed there were wandering around out of necessity).  Hungry again, and realizing that Resha'ad's yellow blood both smelled and tasted like lemon, and that the shining tetrahedron provided butter... all Strum had to do was fireball the thing and they could feast.  After some rolling and burning a couple points of Divine Favor, the sorcerer roasted that crab and they ate well.

Meanwhile, Orin was grateful to not have to stop watching Lesbian Orgy #17 as the wizard did all the work.

Before leaving the system of tunnels and caves far below the Crimson Rock of Sacrifice, they decided to check on that cave showing the moment when Resha'ad stabbed Bendu A'alabin in the kidney just as he was opening the gate, about to be named Qua'ah-Xa'an.  Nothing was there.  Instead, a sign that read "Closed for business."

And that was it.  Finally, we resolved XP and the players recounted their (mis)deeds, as well as, the significant events according to profession, treasure, impact, and goals.  Deacon got the 5th quadrant point.

In two weeks, I'll be at GaryCon running games and shaking tentacles.  I'm hoping the next time we play will be Saturday, March 28th.  Thanks for reading; leave a comment if you'd be so kind.  ;)

VS

p.s.  Yes, weekend badges are now available for July 2026's VENGER CON V: The Will To Power.  Want a great new TTRPG community where you can hang out with other gamers, get ideas, advice, and training in order to improve?  Look no further than the fastest-growing group on X - it's the Kult of Kort'thalis.  Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  

"The Ruin of A'agrybah" - CHA'ALT Campaign 4.3

 

This is the session report for the third session in the fourth year of our Cha'alt campaign.  This entire year-long season is called "The Ruin of A'agrybah" for reasons that, I hope, will become increasingly obvious as the campaign continues.

We had the return of Ug, Tinker's player decided to switch things up and go back to his original character, Ta'al, that had taken a side-quest to Hell in order to pursue personal goals (and upon my suggestion is going to play a completely different character each session, at least that's the plan), and then we had a longstanding player return to the table as he's been unavailable for the first couple of sessions in 2026.

His character is Strum the Terrible, a human sorcerer who works his magic by playing the ukulele which he calls Princess Uka-Leia.  And he's from A'agrybah.  The rest shall be revealed throughout play, which is something I very much support... yet also requires a fair amount of prodding, as it's human to forget that unfinished works that work perfectly fine as they are must be maintained via continuing to build them up, incrementally.

Ug and Ta'al woke up when Strum stumbled into the cave they were sleeping in, realizing that their priest, sorcerer, and servant Flen were missing.  Knowing that it would be foolish to continue without any magic support, they decided to join forces and explore the rest of these caves and tunnels.

Ug's wrist communicator started beeping as he had the most bars, alerting him to the list of names for those nominated for ritual sacrifice on the saba'ath.  Everyone rolled and it was Deacon Elijah Crane whose name appeared.  I explained that if your name is called, you must appear before the priests of A'agrybah.  Once you show up on the saba'ath, it's a bit like jury duty.  Not everyone who is compelled to appear will be sacrificed, and there is a way to either talk and/or buy your way out of being sacrificed.  However, if you don't show up at all, the priests issue an arrest warrant and you will most definitely be on the chopping block the following saba'ath.

Heading out, they felt hungry and thirsty, all their water gone.  There was a root growing down from the ceiling of a tunnel.  It was dripping a milky substance which the adventurers drank and spent about a half-hour filling up their canteens.  Luckily, no wandering monsters appeared.

Continuing on, they noticed some chartreuse shadows dancing on the cave walls up ahead.  A humanoid, his hands coated with zoth, walked towards them, not paying attention as he was conducting magical energy back and forth from his palms. 

Ug stepped aside, Ta'al tackled him by jumping on his back, then missed with Advantage, and the zoth-handed dude attacked, but critically-failed and blew himself back into the cave wall, disoriented.  Meanwhile, Ta'al tumbled away pretending to be a completely different infernal-elf who helped him up and asked if he was ok.  

The PCs found out that someone had recently killed a lesser-spawn and there was zoth all over the place, which attracted a whole bunch of people.  This guy with zoth all over his hands was not a sorcerer, but there was a sorcerer grabbing zoth.  So, they investigated and found it to be true.  

They saw a guy submerging his daggers into zoth, another guy sitting in the zoth playing with it like he was in a kiddie pool, and a sorcerer standing by a hovering platform containing a half-dozen storage-cubes full of zoth.  As the PCs introduced themselves, he showed them his power by blasting a bullseye on the other side of this massive cavern with just his finger.  The sorcerer's name was Zarta'ak, and he was looking to build an army to take over these caves.  

Ta'al convinced him that they should team-up, return to the city, and rob the first national bank of A'agrybah.  Zarta'ak didn't hate the idea, and so the four of them continued exploring with Zarta'ak leading from the rear.  But not before taking advantage of the zoth, bathing their weapons in it, and taking some in a canteen to fuel spells or whatnot later.  

Up a little ways and to the left, they saw a long cave that, when they got just a little ways through, turned them around so they were immediately walking back out of the cave they were trying to enter, like a glitch in the matrix.  Magic was afoot.  They tried some stuff to no avail, then Zarta'ak suggested they searched around.  They found an infernal-glyph that read "spill the blood."  Ta'al pricked his finger and stuck it into the invisible cave barrier.  The blood was absorbed by the magic wall and created a small hole.

Moments later, the PCs grabbed the guy splashing zoth on himself and stabbed him repeatedly before throwing him into the barrier, which dissolved, killing the guy in the process.  Now able to fully explore the long cave, they went in and saw a race of tall, thin humanoids, gesturing in prayer or ritual, carved into the back wall in bas-relief.  It was undetermined if these were actually stone people, people turned to stone, or simply artistic representations of people chiseled into the wall.  But each one had an orange crystal giving off fuchsia and chartreuse energy in the middle of their forehead like a third eye.  There were 9 crystals total, and a bunch of ancient glyphs on nearby walls telling the tale of Sarna'ath...

The sarna'athians were an almost forgotten race, the essence of their empire imprisoned within the stone wall bas-relief, specifically the crystals.  Their realm was conquered and the people of Sarna'ath slaughtered or enslaved... their god, Ba'al-Yigura'ath, a Great Old One that crawled upon the surface of Cha'alt thousands of years ago, denigrated by the conquerors.  A further message read that whoever would submerge their ultra-telluric crystals in zoth shall spread vengeance to the descendants of those who conquered their race.

Ta'al wanted no part of it, but Ug took 2 of the tangerine, fuchsia, and chartreuse third-eye crystals, Strum took 3, and Zarta'ak took the remaining 4.  They realized that any revenge taken by dipping these crystals in zoth might come back to bite them in the ass, as they might be descended from the people who conquered Sarna'ath.

Since there was a moment to take a breath, I thought why not take a suggestion from the black skull and see how that plays out.  It was something that either Elijah Crane or Lanar's player had come up with since none of the three seated claimed to have written it.  It was a swarm of undead pixie fairies coming at them.  So, that's what happened.  Zarta'ak cast a fireball which burned most of them up while the others attacked and took some damage.  Eventually, the undead pixie-fairies were defeated.

Oh, and Ug took the ashes from an undead pixie-fairy and sprinkled them over a zoth puddle, creating a zoth-fairy named Arizona (because he rose like a phoenix) who followed Ug as a father-figure.

Checking out the tunnel and cave to the right, they saw a Lovecraftian monstrosity known as a veil-shredder eating reality, a side-effect was that it created a portal.  On the other side of this dimensional gateway was purple sand, water as vast as the desert, and blue sky (although, now that I've had time to think about it, I think the sky over the purple islands should also be purple... it just makes sense).  Some other tentacled creature was on the other side, menacing a chain-gang of slaves, a couple droids taking the slaves somewhere, and a barbarian with a sword emanating cosmic fire.

The PCs jumped through to steal the slaves, but then got attacked by the creature.  A whole big melee ensued... Strum's player stimulated the GRINDHOUSE EXPLOITATION Cha'alt X-Card, and I determined that due to the circumstances, the droids changed their protocol to murder-bots.  Their arm transformed into chainsaws as they now attacked the slaves and PCs.  But that gave Strum a chance to reroll his fireball spell which turned out better than a critical-failure.

Eventually, the creature was killed, one droid destroyed, the barbarian killed, and the slaves were now with the PCs.  Ug's player then stimulated the HUMOR Cha'alt X-Card and Ta'al's player had a suggestion that the droid was like the Terminator - various lines from Arnold were said as its robot hand reached for them before it was destroyed.  Ta'al took the droid's hand in case he could cause some kind of A.I. revolution down the road.

After the battle, the dark-elf went back through the portal to retrieve the fallen barbarian's cosmic-fire bastard sword.  Before leaving the area, that, too, was submerged in a pool of zoth.  Also, I rolled on the personality table because magic sword from the purple islands are sentient.  Curiosity was the result, so I roleplayed the sword as one curious bastard, always asking questions.

Three of the slaves were female, Tasha (blonde), Lela (red-head), and Storm (brunette), and the fourth was a male dark-elf named Grenthal.  They were going to be sacrificed at a festival on one of the purple islands when the shadow-moon was at its zenith.  The PCs freed them from their chains, but not necessarily from their obligations to the adventurers.  After some celebratory fun time, they continued exploring the caves and tunnels.  I half-expected them to search more of the purple islands, but they were invested here.  Oh, and Zarta'ak stayed behind on the purple islands with his zoth to make a new life for himself.  We'll see if he returns in a later session.

A bit later, the PCs found a couple of genocidal gemstone warriors fighting to the death, a green sorceress and red warrior.  They watched the battle, routing for the green woman.  After a quick roll to determine victory, the red warrior bested her.  Her spirit returned to energy back inside the green gemstone.  The red guy let Ta'al keep the green gem as the red gem warrior walked with them in case that way led to more genocidal gemstone warriors, as there can be only one!

Pretty soon, they came to another massive cavern containing a gargantuan cave-crab.  They heard screams from afar, and watched close as the crab used its pinchers and mouth to kill several humanoids.  Realizing there wasn't another way out of there, Strum decided to use the rest of Ug's canteen and gourd of zoth to power a mass-invisibility spell.

As this was an expansive use of sorcery fueled by an alternative energy source, I had Strum's player roll on the Fuchsia Shadow spell side-effect table and he got a 74.  Reading it, magical swords nearby became possessed by the spirit of Venger Satanis, mixed with curiosity, I suppose.  Lol, so that happened.

As they moved through the cave to safety and a nearby tunnel in order to explore the rest of this area, the giant crab could smell them.  Out of their entire entourage, the person who rolled lowest was the blonde Tasha.  But I rolled a 2 on the crab's attack and she managed to jump out of the way of its death-claw.

At that point we only had 10-minutes or so before it was time to go, so we ended it there and went to the XP phase of the session.  The players recounted their exploits in terms of profession, loot, making an impression on the world, and personal goals.  

The benefit of this system over what I had been doing, simply leveling the PCs after 2 sessions, is the players discuss what was accomplished, what transpired, and gaps in their "adventuring lifestyle" are then revealed.  In our case, everyone needs to come up with additional personal goals - especially Ug, who again fell short in that area, but made up for it by being awarded the 5th quadrant for MVP of that session.

As the GM, I'm ok with requiring PC goals, and not just in terms of XP.  If I can tell players they have to choose a character class, I can also tell them they have to come up with an aim, something they want to achieve in life, because that's part of a player-character... but you get better cooperation with honey than vinegar, so I'll incentivize the addition of personal motivations.  Maybe something as simple as a point of Divine Favor for each goal chosen and pursued.  Of course, there's always the threat of a stick, rather than the carrot.  I could say that 3rd level "feats" won't be offered until goals are solidified.  I don't think that will be necessary, though.  

It's all a means to an end.  Having and trying to achieve personal goals adds to the roleplaying experience, which improves immersion, and that leads to a little something I've been talking about these last few years... PSYCHOCOSM.  

Immersion, I've come to understand, is a process.  It's value is not the raw act of being immersed itself, but what that state of being surrounded by and absorbed with confers.  Similar to the adventure, it's actually like dipping or submerging one's hand or weapon or what-have-you in zoth.  Immersing something in that glowing chartreuse awesomeness is not actually the end goal, there's another level, and that is the transformation of something base, ordinary, or mundane into something magical.

In the same way, feeling immersed in a roleplaying game is awesome, but the reason why it's awesome is because of the final result, our imagination believes, perhaps only for a few moments or an entire lifetime, that what is happening at the table is actually happening, albeit in a separate reality... (the "shared imaginary space," which is what defines roleplaying games) going from the subjective to objective, we treat it as though it were real.  Like when you watch a movie, you're transported to another world, for a time, where those characters in that location doing those things is taking place.

This is what PSYCHOCOSM is all about, the blending or blurring of lines between the real world and the imagined world.  That magical transformation is the final achievement of roleplaying games which most people aren't even consciously aware of, yet many recognize that feeling when they're experiencing it.  

If I may extend the analogy, immersion is like the physical act of having sex.  As the GM, RPG ruleset, campaign setting and adventure designer, players, tools like house-rules, dice, etc. those are all the things that lead to sex.  

Playing at the table, actual roleplaying, and the goal of being immersed are the sexual positions, logistics, sucking, fucking, thrusting, and all that.  But the orgasm itself is the ultimate purpose.  Don't get me wrong, all the rest of the stuff is awesome, too, but there's a reason why it's called the climax... sex without orgasm, like immersion without PSYCHOCOSM, just isn't the same.

Going a bit further, sex done "right," or perhaps I should say "in a certain way," can produce a child.  For some, that is the end-end-goal... for others that's a (happy) accident or byproduct.  It's a reminder that artistic creation and participation in that process can have lasting... reverberations. 

Of course, we can't just point at one thing, such as personal goals, and say that's the road leading us to immersion and eventually, God willing, PSYCHOCOSM.  It also has to do with priorities, play-style, table-culture, meaningful choices, description and narration, player engagement, vibes, etc... which is why I try to run Cha'alt as an open-world, fiction-first, storygame-adjacent, rules-light, theater of the mind, improvisational kind of campaign setting.

Ok, that was a Hell of a tangent.  Hey, that's why I have a blog, right?  

All in all, a very productive and enjoyable session.  Next game should be Saturday, March 7th and then two weeks from then is GaryCon and I don't yet know how that scheduling is going to shake out.  Speaking of GaryCon, I hope to see some of you guys there next month.  If you see me, feel free to say hi.  Let's get a picture together!  And, yes, I'll autograph whatever... even your girlfriend's rockin' tits.  ;)

Thanks for reading,

VS

p.s.  Yes, weekend badges are now available for July 2026's VENGER CON V: The Will To Power.  Want a great new TTRPG community where you can hang out with other gamers, get ideas, advice, and training in order to improve?  Look no further than the fastest-growing group on X - it's the Kult of Kort'thalis.  Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  

"The Ruin of A'agrybah" - CHA'ALT Campaign 4.2

 

We doubled last session's player-count, that brings us up to 4.  The new player made it, and fit well within the group.  He's a younger guy, and the son of a major player in the campaign.  So, hopefully he'll stick around.

The PCs in this, our second session in the fourth year of our face-to-face Cha'alt campaign, are as follows...

Deacon Elijah Crane, human priest; pixie-fairy sorcerer Lanar Tinklefoot who gets high on his own fairy dust, and is always on the lookout for various creams; Ug the lizardtaur warrior who also believes himself to be a lawyer with his growing familiarity regarding the magic liar's book that always seems to accompany the airing of grievances; and a short-lived infernal-elf survivalist named Ta'al who is looking for his Dad, a demon, last known whereabouts... Hell.

First, we tackled XP from last session.  I thought it would be edifying for the group to see how XP was awarded before ending with their own calculations when this session was over.  Ug and Deacon went over the highs and lows of the previous session, which jogged our collective memory.

Then, I went over rumors the other two PCs had heard just before leaving A'agrybah...

• The King of A'agrybah, Agamen, is courting a lady demon named Channa.  She is to be his guest at the upcoming festival called The Night of Too Many Tentacles.
• Channa was a liaison between the Infernal Descent and royal family of A'agrybah.  It is assumed that she fell in love with King Agamen and for the last few month, the two have been seen together at various city functions.
• At the upcoming saba'ath, the city's priests will inoculate worshipers of the Great Old Ones with something that protects people from being enchanted by the New Gods.  This is coming just in time as the arrival of a New God, Ephraim, has already drawn hundreds of followers from their faithful worship of Yog-Soggoth, Nyza'ag-Shud, and Igg-Yig-Yatha'ak.  They say just one look at the New God brings men to their knees.

As we left off, Ug and Deacon were on the demon-side of the rainbow wall, waiting for the big battle to break out.  Lanar and Ta'al were already on their own quest to find the infernal realm and some delicious Hell-cream.  The two newcomers walked behind Deacon and Ug, surprising them, and then getting shushed so their wait-and-see hiding spot wouldn't get noticed.

After some rolls, the insect-demons outnumbered the Federation; however, their high-tech firepower was no match for the spiked-clubs and swords of the demon faction.  After losing about half their number, the demon side fled into the further recesses of those caves.

Conferring with the Federation soldiers after the battle, Captain Frank was preparing to set thermal detonators at the narrowest points in tunnels connecting this area with the extended pathways.  In the meantime, the PCs decided to explore what was right in front of them.  

The first cave they came to was a red portal of swirling energy.  A demon was passing into it as the PCs entered.  Ta'al and Lanar went in while the others stayed put.  Ta'al realized this was Hell and was probably his best chance to find his father.  He headed towards obsidian spires as a Hell-worm barreled down upon him.  Meanwhile, Lanar thought better of this plan and went back into the portal.  Shortly after that, a pixie-fairy named Tinker (from the Communist dimension, allegedly) also exited the Hell portal.  

Since Ta'al had completed his personal quest in record time, Tinker joined the adventurers and became the party's thief.  So it goes...

The next cave showed a man doubled-over in pain with severe stomach cramps, holding a gilded scroll tube embossed with the royal seal.  As the PCs approached, he told them of the Guild of Shadows (which he was a member of, and the PCs could see the shadow-glyph tattooed upon his forearm).  His guild contact was named Vruta'as, a bartender at the Blue Banana.  This guy, Preytus, mentioned something about a wet thing going down his throat when he was attacked in the middle of the night.  He slew one of his attackers and wounded another.  Then, took a scroll tube containing a page from the Dyaza'anine Prophecies, stole a sand-speeder, and fled into the desert to meet with his contact - a tangerine-elf named OJ that lived down here in this system of caves.

The PCs took the scroll tube as was offered by the dying man, and then he passed out... just before his stomach burst and two purple tentacles shot out of his abdomen, wrapping around Ug's neck and Deacon's torso.  After a few hacks and slashes, the purple tentacles were defeated.  Lanar grabbed his coin pouch, and Tinker searched the cave, finding a hole just big enough for a pixie-fairy.  On the other side, he saw a trio of insect-demons planning a counter-strike on the Federation.

Looking at the scroll inside the tube, it was a prophecy stating that if A'agrybah's King married a demoness, the entire city will surely fall into ruin.  A plan was soon hatched by the PCs - steal as much of the King's wealth as possible so the demon-bitch loses interest in him and possibly starts dating one of the PCs, instead.  A bold strategy, Cotton. 

Leaving the area, the PCs found another unexplored cave with seemingly nothing in it, except for some humanoid bones scattered around.  Remembering the black skull suggestion-box, I asked the players to each write a suggestion of something they might want to see at some point later in the campaign, and picked one of the two suggestions that were in the black skull from last time - a lake of nacho cheese!

It seems that empty cave wasn't so empty after all.  "These pretzels are making me thirsty," they heard before entering into a hidden passage leading down into an underground lake of molten yellow-orange deliciousness.  On the edge of the nacho cheese lake were pretzel-people who danced around, waiting for someone to eat them.  There was someone already down there partaking of the pretzel-people, but I don't think anyone talked to him.  The PCs tried the pretzels on for size and realized they kept talking even when you were eating them, with their high-pitched voice and nothing better to do.

Enjoying themselves and taking some nacho cheese for later, they kept exploring.  They found another cave containing several orange-furred man-apes wearing brown robes of a monk or nomad.  Another portal - this time leading to the apes' home dimension.  These ape-men were searching for crystals, and would trade them for slaves, but the PCs didn't want to part with their crystals and so traded knowledge of Nacho Lake with them for a small and scrawny humanoid wielding a bow and arrow named Flen (everyone seemed to get his name wrong, but how mad can you really get when you're already a slave... just shake it off and focus on the tasks you're given).

Many more caves were explored... one containing only three insect-demons but all of the PCs' initial attacks failed miserably so they passed it off as interpretive dance.  There was some kind of grub-worm guarding the stairs down to the next level (bypassed for now).  A cave with several more demons and an altar where a Federation soldier was tied-up.  They splashed a basin of weird green liquid onto him and watched as the human soldier transformed into one of their kind (an insect-demon).  After their trouble with the cave of 3 demons earlier, the PCs considered bypassing it, but then Flen shot an arrow into one of the demons and battle commenced.  Lanar used a spell for the first time - fireball, and destroyed most of them, but then was wiped-out from casting.  And there was another cave full of eggs, including a cave painting of a weird type of owl-bear.  They took one egg for cooking, a second egg for keeping, and destroyed the others.

Eventually, they went back to the stairway going down.  The sorcerer used ectoplasmic webbing on the grub-worm's mandibles as Tinker tried to befriend the creature.  He rolled a natural 20, so I allowed him to make friends and mount the grub-worm.

Below, they encountered a woman who told them this was the place of the hollow cave where no gods, nor goddesses resided.  In fact, religion was all but banned.  However, that didn't stop her or her tribe from praising the elemental spirits for their protection and guidance.  Then, she performed a ceremonial dance while reciting a poem about her bowel-movements.

After awhile, the PCs pushed on to find a tribal meeting where everyone was asked to write a Cha'altian ha'aiku, and the worst ha'aiku meant that you were going to be decapitated, cooked, and eaten by the rest of the tribe.  I recorded the ha'aiku for posterity, here (including the one I hastily wrote for the party's NPC, Flen)...

Lanar

I must drink cream
to make dust
to snort off of a woman's butt

Deacon

Hippie cave freaks
Sing of shit
And blaspheme the Lords of Light

Ug

Purple sun high

So am I

Want to make new leather parts

Tinker

If you try to

Behead me

I'll chop your balls off and eat them

Flen

This is not good

Hopelessly

Fuchsia Chartreuse violence

____________

The adventurers all managed to pass, so instead three masked tribesmen took someone else to behead and start cooking.  Ug stole a gourd bowl.

Down a strange little path to another cave, the PCs came upon a man selling tickets to an attraction further up the tunnel.  This ticket-seller wore a shabby burgundy coat and tall hat made entirely of feathers.  Reluctantly, the PCs paid the man all 15 of their talons, and stepped forward to see what all the fuss was about.

Basically, a middle-aged man (Bendu A'alabin) with a scroll and his servant went up to a cave wall containing a circular placing of glowing crystals.  After splashing zoth, cutting his palm, and reading from his scroll, intent on becoming the Qua'aha-Xa'an of the Great Old One Ona'ak-Maya'az.  Before the initiation could be finalized, the servant stabbed his master in the kidney, followed by a weird noise, cha'altquake, falling to his knees, and full protonic reversal as reality imploded - only for the stage to reset as the man and his servant entered the cave and everything started again from the beginning.

Not knowing what to make of it, they questioned the ticket-seller who didn't have any first-hand knowledge.  He got this gig from a friend who mysteriously disappeared awhile ago.  Someone, I believe it was Tinker, tried to get his money back and tried to shiv the ticket-seller when he didn't provide a refund, but Flen got in the way, making him miss.  As he ran away, the ticket-seller dropped a little note that read "eggs, milk, chicken, and the glowing tetrahedron."  They took that scrap of paper with them.

Soon, the PCs wandered into a cave with a blood-red scroll where a bunch of these hollow cave atheist-cultists were giving themselves paper-cuts in order to abstain from the suffering of divine oppression or something.  The adventurers eventually offered that scrap of grocery-list paper for the parchment scroll, upon which was written a prophecy from the Nya'azian scrolls.

This particular prophecy, steeped in blood and therefore becoming more and more true by the day, speaks of the Great Old One Ona'ak-Maya'az, unable to awaken because his Qua'aha-Xa'an was murdered before the initiation ritual was complete.  

That's all we had time for, and we went over the various XP quadrants... Professionalism (class based), Treasure (loot acquired), Reckoning Force (who loves, fears, and/or respects you), and Goals (personal achievements)... reminding the players to choose somewhere around 3 personal goals for their character, as that would give them something to strive for.

As you can see, little ideas like incorporating random suggestions can have a big impact on the game.  That was Ug's player's suggestion, so he earned a point of Divine Favor for it.  I prepared more this time around, but still getting used to a 4-hour game.  

Lots of strangeness in store, but can't reveal anything until it's time.  Thanks for reading, commenting, and sharing!

VS

p.s.  Yes, weekend badges are now available for July 2026's VENGER CON V: The Will To Power.  Want a great new TTRPG community where you can hang out with other gamers, get ideas, advice, and training in order to improve?  Look no further than the fastest-growing group on X - it's the Kult of Kort'thalis.  Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  

Year 4 of the CHA'ALT Campaign Begins!

 

Two-and-a-half months ago, we concluded year 3 of our Cha'alt campaign, and yesterday we launched into our 4th year.  At the end of this blog post, I'll talk about my goals for year 4, preparation, etc.

But now, let's get into it.  Weirdly, I only had 2 players.  1 was sick (this has been the season of sickness, actually, I think I've been sick every 3 or 4 weeks since the end of VENGER CON... damn!), 1 had a long-standing appointment to get a massive tattoo (better be Cha'alt-themed, hoss), 1 new player thought the game was on a different day (I don't have direct contact with that player because it's the adult son of a current player (that's why I always send out text reminders a couple days prior), and 1 was just MIA (he texted me weeks ago to make sure we were playing and I sent him announcements and reminders but he never contacted me back).

So yeah, character creation was easy with only 2 players.  1 had a character concept ready to go, the other browsed the options in Advanced Crimson Dragon Slayer and pieced his character together right in front of us.  There's no right, wrong, or best method of generating a character.  And, in my estimation, character creation is a year-long process.  Just as I'm always discovering and/or forging new aspects of Cha'alt, players identify new aspects of their characters... which is awesome, true to life, and the way it should be.  

We had Deacon Elijah Crane, a human priest of the Celestial Temple of the Lords of Light from the planet Erath, a human-centric world, who found himself enmeshed with the Federation.  He was temporarily sent (exiled?) to Cha'alt for "diversity training," as he believed that humans were a superior species to all the other humanoids, and specifically chosen / favored by the gods and made in their likeness (at least, that's my interpretation).

Next was "Ug," a lizardtaur warrior who doesn't really think about anything too deeply.  His birth-name is rather unpronounceable (even by Cha'alt standards... yikes!).  Some people say "ugh" when he walks by, so that name stuck.  I clarified my vision of the lizardtaur, there's no horse, it's just part man (the humanoid half is probably a bit reptilian, more or less) and the bottom half is all lizard, but a four-legged lizard like an iguana or gecko.  He wears a human skin vest and normally wields a scale-shooter.

I picked-out a new set of dice (I have lots that I still haven't ever used, and a couple sets that I've only used once or twice).  These are chartreuse-green with dark-fuchsia numbers... perfect!  And holy shit, those angled-spheres roll awesome - they are PC-killers, doom dice... "Surprise, motherfucker!"

Also, we used Zeeku, where the players rolled a d6 along with their d20.  On a 1, it added a complication; on a 6, it added an opportunity.  To incentivize players to use the system, when a complication arises from a 1 result, a point of Divine Favor is added to the player-pool for anyone at the table to use.

Answering an advertisement for grand adventure on the Chartreuse Worm cantina message board, the PCs and a couple other guys showed up at the appointed time mid-morning at the cantina.  The cantina's manager addressed them, handing them a spatula, mop, and bar rag, expecting them to start working there at the cantina.

Oh yeah, on the way to the cantina that morning, they overheard a Federation announcement about the water shortage and how it would benefit citizens of A'agrybah to turn-in their neighbors for water use infractions.  And sand scavenging is expressly forbidden.  And just as they turned onto the street of Incontinent Unicorns, where the cantina was located, they noticed a large, digital billboard hanging in the fuchsia sky.  On the billboard was a woman in geisha makeup wearing a kimono and drinking a crimson can of coca-cola.  

You see, A'agrybah, like most Cha'alt cities, has a symbiotic relationship with the Great Old Ones.  The Old Ones require humanoid sacrifices to show their faith, it strengthens worship which empowers these Dark Gods.  Every month, 111 people in the city are sacrificed.  Those who make the list are named from the dregs of society... criminals, the unemployed, homeless, crippled, the lazy, stupid, and weak, beggars, debtors, you get the idea.  It basically exempts the priesthood (of which Deacon Elijah Crane is not a part), Federation personnel, administrators, politicians, gladiators, merchants, guild members, and various VIPs.  It's possible for lowly labor-grade citizens (and certainly disobedient slaves) to find their names on the sacrificial list, but unlikely.  Also, there's a way to buy your way out of that particular predicament to the tune of 437 talons.

As the PCs began their first shift, they overheard a couple of elves talking about a hole in the ground they discovered beneath the Crimson Rock of Sacrifice.  Apparently, the hole leads to a long, winding stone stairway going down far below the desert.  The elves believe there are riches down there (oh yeah, dio-r'sum is the word for "down below," which has more of an exotic and romanticized "mythic underworld" connotation), and just need strong backs to carry all the loot back to A'agrybah.

The elves didn't get any takers when randomly asking cantina patrons, but Deacon Elijah Crane overheard enough, and volunteered himself and Ug to the task.  The elves, Frayick and Froon, would pick them up on a liberated reptilian riding-spider tomorrow mid-morning (the Federation has been cracking down on all forms of transportation in the city - as planned, this adventure builds off last week's Cha'alt one-shot).

In the meantime, the PCs kept working.  During a break, the head-chef asked if they wanted to go out back in the alleyway and smoke the pineal gland of a desert black centipede.  Deacon doesn't do drugs - especially weird alien drugs on a degenerate planet like Cha'alt, so he passed.  Ug, however, was down.  They smoked and began seeing various subliminal propaganda messages behind what was presented on the surface.  For instance, that digital billboard with the geisha woman revealed an eldritch-glyph that said "The Old Ones were, the Old Ones are, and the Old Ones shall be!" underneath the surface.  Roger and the other player in that virtual VENGER CON one-shot will hopefully appreciate that, as it happened to them, too, but in a different form.  It's all part of the skinematic Vengerverse, folks!  ;)

Later, 3 missionaries from Kra'adumek walked into the cantina, bothering customers with their religious spiel.  Deacon Crane soon put a stop to their proselytizing a false religion, as he talked smack about their purple alien demon-worm.  One of the missionaries pulled out a dagger, thinking the priest bartender would back down.  Nope.  Deacon pulled out his belt-whip and smacked it down on the mauve missionary's shoulder.  Ouch!  With that, the missionaries left the cantina. 

The elves showed-up with supplies - weapons, water, and pick-axes, along with that reptilian riding-spider they stole.  On the way out of the city, bribing a gate guard as they went, the elves cautioned the adventurers not to say that they were going dio-r'sum, as that is against the law of the Great Old Ones.  There's just too much down there that could be disturbed... or awakened.  Not wanting to chance it, the Old Ones, through their priests, made it illegal to go poking around the various subterranean realms below the desert.

An hour after starting out, their riding-spider lurched forward with a jerk that nearly threw its passengers and supplies.  Its scaly leg got caught by a tentacle attached to a zarla'ac-pit.  By the time, the PCs and elves hopped down, three tentacles were wrapped around three of its eight legs and the riding-spider was being dragged into the awaiting maw full of big teeth.

Ug smashed his shield down upon a tentacle, severing it.  But two more wrapped around him and its next attack, if successful, would pull him into its mouth.  Sure enough, I rolled a crit next round and Ug got chomped... hard.  He was at negative 2 HP.  That means, if no one came to his immediate aid, he was as good as dead.  Thankfully, the party's priest saved the day, healing him as he dragged the lizardtaur out of there.  Meanwhile, the elves hopped back onto their reptilian spider and said goodbye, not thinking that Deacon and Ug would make it out alive.  

But then Ug scored a crit of his own and enough tentacles were severed that the zarla'ac simply left them alone.  Tracking the reptilian spider on foot was no easy task, but payback was on their mind, and the energy of that negative emotion kept them apace... until the spider slowed, coming to a couple of caravans angled towards each other.  Humanoids were out in the sand, talking or shouting or looking at something.  The elves jumped down to converse with a group of black robed folks and a separate group of pallid-green robed folks.  Meanwhile, the PCs snuck upon the spider's back to steal it away from the elves who left them to die not more than an hour ago.

As they pulled-out, the elves said to the caravan men, "Hey, your new slaves are getting away."  The PCs were soon being pursued by six men on foot who were running after the reptilian spider.  Ug shot them with his scale slingshot as one of the robed men had a crossbow and kept firing.  Eventually, enough were wounded by the lizardtaur to stop the men from running after them.  

It wasn't long before the PCs arrived at the Crimson Rock of Sacrifice.  I rolled on the same random table as that one-shot, and sure enough Deacon Elijah Crane had some experience with that sacred location.  Shortly after the Deacon arrived on Cha'alt, he was cheated in a game of 17-dimensional chess by a scoundrel.  A sympathetic onlooker told the priest something he heard - that if you sacrifice someone upon the Crimson Rock, it grants you favor with the gods.

Anyway, the jumped-off their spider mount and soon found the fissure at the bottom of a crater, in the shadow of the Crimson Rock of Sacrifice.  Heading down into it, Ug barely making it through, they took their first steps down when they heard something from above - the sound of machines.

Both caravans were converging on the PCs' spider.  They waited and watched, after debating on whether they should make a stand here or go further down hoping to escape them once reaching the bottom.  The two elves stayed back by the reptilian spider they originally stole - holding what appeared to be a large orange-glowing crystal - while the robed men, 9 of them, walked towards the fissure. 

The lizardtaur climbed the rock wall, getting close enough to skewer the first person coming through.  Which he did, with a critical-hit (I believe with a 6 on his d6, as well).  The black robed man was instantly decapitated as his body was wedged into the fissure.  When another man went to help his friend out, Ug killed him, too.  

At that, the robed men from the caravans realized this whole place and/or plan was cursed and took their leave - also taking the orange crystal and the elves with them - as slaves.  Two slaves were offered, and two slaves they now have.  ;)

Additionally, the caravan men decided to leave the reptilian riding-spider because this is a dangerous region of the S'kbah desert.  Better to be safe and secure inside the fiberglass caravan than out in the open riding atop another elf's stolen spider.  BTW, Ug named the spider Harry.

The stairway was 6-feet wide with a drop-off on either side, about 8-10-feet beyond the stairs were cave walls festooned with gems, minerals, crystals, and veins of unknown deposits.  Too far away to easily pluck as one walked down.

Making their way, the came upon a massive blob of translucent pinkish purple organic material with blue veins.  One of them poked it with a stick, for which it created a pseudopod to thrash them with.  After taking a bit of damage, Ug shot it and the thing retreated down the stairs and hugged the underside.

At the bottom, the PCs saw a half-dozen Federation soldiers standing around a machine, a type of non-food replicator (as Deacon recognized) that was fabricating the missing crystal keys assumed to open the long cement-block wall painted with a 7-color rainbow, each band of color terminating with an indentation.  2 of the colors were already present, housed in their indentation - one purple, the other blue.

Deacon approached with conversation, gave them his ID so the Federation could verify who he was.  He and Ug, the priest's "assistant," seemed eager to help, so the Federation allowed them to stay.  After awhile, they searched the area to see if the Federation missed anything.  Ug eventually found an eldritch-glyph that looked similar to the one he noticed on that digital-billboard.  The glyph meant "This is the way."  Ug pushed around the glyph and the wall moved a few inches.  He pushed again and a secret tunnel opened.  

Crawling through the 5-foot tunnel, they eventually reached a wide-open cavern containing 9 insectoid-demons.  Unsure of their strength, the PCs began blasting.  Being first level, they soon realized they were outmatched and ran back to get reinforcements.  The Federation captain allowed one of his men, Frank, to go back through the tunnel armed with a blaster (they gave Deacon a blaster, too).  Ug stole the purple crystal from its home when no one was looking, placing it within his human-skin vest.

Finding fewer demons, and two short green-skinned humanoids, they attacked again.  This time, they had a chance, but the green guys used some kind of psionic power on them.  It made them feel like some dark, arachnid-like force was over and on top of them, crushing them.  After a couple failed saves, the PCs were knocked unconscious and taken to a iron cell hanging about 6-feet from the ground.  They were in a different cave with several bug-demons attending.

Using the purple crystal Ug liberated from the rainbow wall, Deacon super-charged his beam, blasting the demons.  From there, they forced the cell open and escaped.  All these bug-demons had on them was a femur-scepter and human bone necklace.

Eventually, they caught up to more demons, told Frank to head back through the tunnel and warn the others because a formidable force was waiting for the Federation soldiers on the other side.

I think that's where we ended it.  

Wasn't used to prepping a 4-hour session since I've been running 90-minute and 2-hour games since the end of October.  Will have to get on that for next time.  Fewer players always makes the game go faster, too.

I've been watching videos from this YouTuber, her channel is WriteSparky.  It's been inspiring me to write my Pulp-Drenched Cities of Cha'alt book, and providing me with the much-needed push to flesh-out Cha'alt.  This goes back to what I was saying at the top... you'd think that after 8 years, you'd pretty much have a campaign setting all sewn-up, that the fundamentals have been squared away, all that's left are new details based on what the PCs are doing from adventure to adventure.  Well, you'd be wrong.  There always seems to be more to write, more to think about, more to create.

Hopefully, this year of the campaign will showcase the inner workings.  Those details aren't just background; this isn't subtext.  No, they translate to what's right there on the page and in front of the players' faces - it's the bloody text!

Oh yeah, just before we finished the session, I told both players to write something that they'd like to see happen in a future session.  You can read all about that right over here!

And there were three ones rolled consecutively.  You know what that means... a portal opened, an arm emerged with a hand holding a fish, the fish slapped the adventurers across the face, the arm withdrew, and the portal closed. 

When it comes to experience points, I'll hash that out at the start of next session, in two weeks, so the players are familiar with what to expect.  But I did make a point of awarding both players the bonus point for MVP because they showed up.  Hey, if you want to see my brand-new XP and leveling rules I'll be trying out, email me: Venger.Satanis@yahoo.com

As for my plans for this campaign, I'm pacing myself.  Starting slow, easing into things, and when it ends with a bang, that'll really be something.  Ok, cool.  Thanks for reading, hoss!

Enjoy,

VS

p.s.  Yes, weekend badges are now available for July 2026's VENGER CON V: The Will To Power.  Want a great new TTRPG community where you can hang out with other gamers, get ideas, advice, and training in order to improve?  Look no further than the fastest-growing group on X - it's the Kult of Kort'thalis.  Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  

Sessions 11, 12, and 13 for the Virtual Hump-Day CHA'ALT Campaign

 

Lots of stuff going on, in real life and gaming.  This will not be an exhaustive summary, only the barest of details shall be provided because I'm falling behind and have to prepare for Saturday's restart of our face-to-face Cha'alt campaign going on its 4th year.  Let's get to it...

Session XXX... you know what, I'm just going to give you the story so far, rather than break it up into session chunks.  I'm losing track, but want to maintain the rhythm

Huey Lewis and the News was playing just off-screen pretty much the entire time - especially their song Pineapple Express.  

The PCs managed to wander into a Chinese restaurant and were told to come up with their own ha'aiku before they'd be shown the slut-glyph carved upon the floor of their fine establishment.  ST came up with a good one, and then they saw it...

The pimp who showed them threw a special sand on the glyph and it glowed with magenta fire.

Then, they found a really big room containing a giant spider that was sleeping on the floor glyph they needed to complete the ha'aiku.  Since they still had that dreaming insect that would allow them to enter people's dreams, they figured why the Hell not and squirted that jale-hued dream juice everywhere, temporarily trapping them in the giant spider's dream.

There were other, smaller spiders in the room too.  After a trip to the women's restroom and emerging with a pair of panties, the other spiders got excited and started to spider-jack as the PCs got sleepy, entering the giant spider's dream.

They're in some kind of cave with a spider-woman who looks a bit like Sydney Sweeney.  She asks the PCs to kill a man.  Intrigued, they follow her to see what's going on.  Oh yeah, ST, being a droid, doesn't dream like we do and so the sleep juice wouldn't work on him.  But he had an idea of creating an interactive simulation with computers and stuff that would allow him to also enter the dream, albeit virtually.

The PCs see a snake-man viewing the interior of a magic portal.  That portal shows the PCs themselves drinking and watching strippers dance in an A'agrybah cantina.  Curious, the adventurers watch as Ka'az is stabbed by a stripper.  

All Hell breaks loose as the PC doubles are in combat and the actual PCs are fighting people, and it's chaos. Plus, Ka'az had sex with another woman that looked an awful lot like Sydney Sweeney, but not at all like a spider.  Afterwards, he pulled a small Cthulhu idol out of her vagina, adding that to his written list of treasures... as one does.

By the time they saw the little-person riding a tricycle, the dream was ending and they were back in that room with the spiders.  All the little spiders were tired from their exertion, and the PCs wrote down the entire ha'aiku...

Pussy tendrils
Sickly sweet
With pungent fish taco meat

Had a new player.  During the back and forth of trying to figure out what character concept he wanted, I thought of black-elves, like the drow depicted in old-school D&D modules.  Not dark skinned but pitch black, but their name and character is derived from black metal... although, their skin is just as black as the unquiet void.  

Still thinking about that racial special ability.  What I wrote later in the session was that black-elves consider all other "dark" elves to be a bunch of virtue-signaling pussies.  

It's been a common theme lately that we get a new player and have to tell them that this right here, talking back and forth, me describing stuff and you guys telling me what your character says and does, that's the game.  There's no character sheet, no long process of character generation, no map or tokens or any of that.  It's just communicating what's in our imagination.

Sometimes, that blows peoples' minds; other times it seems obvious, freeing, actually quite liberating. That's how I run my game, at least virtually.  But, really, that's what it's like in real life face-to-face sessions, too.

So the gigantic spider moved off the glyph on the floor, so the PCs could read it.  He was in the corner of the room making fuchsia and chartreuse balloon animals with the smoke from his bong that was carved with intricate arachnid-glyphs.

Now, they have the full ha'aiku, and their guide, A'ahkmed, asked if he could take them straight to the magenta door.  He was acting very anxious and shifty, so the PCs kept an eye on him.  As they traveled, A'ahkmed walked faster and faster, like he was determined to get there first.

The PCs tried to stop him, and that's why their guide revealed himself to be some kind of insectoid.  There was a scuffle in the race to get to the magenta door.  A'ahkmed tripped and lost his glasses, ST jumped on his prone form and interrogated him, learning that he was offered amnesty by the Fraternal Sect of Insectoids to get on the other side of the magenta door first so he could turn on the death-field on the other side.

The jig being up, the PCs entered into Cremza'amirikza'am through the magenta door and found the lever which activated the death-field.  And we learned there's a word for "hate-boner" on Cha'alt, and it's queur-thode.

As the adventurers explore the tunnels and caves of this cinnamon-infused underworld, the sorcerer Niccolo creates a sand-imp named Sandy who can scout ahead and do light manual labor.

Sandy leads them down a path that gets brighter as they go.  They eventually back off from a huge sandworm with a luminous crystal brain.  The PCs have a cunning plan - they don the pantomime sandworm costume and hope for the best.  Sure enough, the crystal-brain worm passes by them without batting its neck-penis.  Well done!

They keep going and can either head lower down the tunnel or up an escalator.  They choose the latter and find themselves in a kids' chain-restaurant pizza place.  There are large pizza-spiders with pineapple topping crawling all over the restaurant.  

After some exploration, a green portal appears and some guy named Xem gets out and asks the PCs if they've seen any Federation soldiers around.  They say no, and Xem tells the PCs that the Federation are coming and to prepare themselves.  Then 7 red portals appear, surrounding them.

From this day henceforth, I declare the 13th session of a campaign shall include a flashback to an earlier time in the PCs' history.  For this session, we started with 20 years ago.  ST was a wealthy zoth baron sitting in his 70s decor office high above the desert with a big breasted secretary taking dictation.

Ka'az was late for school.  He slept in and his stepmom was feeling naughty.

The other two guys, another noob (meant in the best possible sense) and Dirk were trapped in a locked room with only colored popsicle sticks to work with.

Eventually, The Saint entered a duel with a rival who was upset about ST winning yet another award from the zoth fracking achievement committee.  

Oh yeah, while the PCs were still at the pizza place, there was a shootout between them and the Federation (who were also humanoid bugs, like in Rick & Morty).  ST rolled a critical hit and so did another PC, which whittled them down.  I rolled crappy and did minimal damage.  The last 2 escaped.  Remember last year when I came out with Fairy Dust just after Gary Con 2025 and before VENGER CON IV?

Basically, if the PC wants something, they have to carry the narrative load by justifying the thing they're carrying, experience they've had, someone they know or something in their background, etc.  I ask them 3 pointed questions and if they can answer them sufficiently, then they get what they wanted... within reason and subject to limitations and possible backfiring.

Check out Fairy Dust right over here!

Well, the new guy wanted to be an expert pizza maker so he could throw that pizza pie really well as the Federation goons were escaping back through their portal.  I asked my questions, and he answered.  Boom, working in the pizza industry for years before becoming an adventurer is now part of your backstory - congratulations, hoss!

I was quite pleased that it happened and I got to try out a mechanic that I hadn't really utilized since about 10 months prior at last year's Gary Con.  Yes, he smacked that Federation soldier in the face with piping-hot pizza.  Ouch!

And Nicollo used his detect magic to find a soft drink cup half-full of zoth.  Score!  The sorcerer, for some reason, wanted his facsimile pixie to drink it, knowing that could go bad.  Sure enough, the entity inside the purple pixie shell grew more powerful... but not so powerful that he could break out.  

But then, Ka'az's player stimulated the ELDRITCH Cha'alt X-Card.  The entity had the Innsmouth taint and opened a portal where an image (maybe the real thing, who knows?) of the entity but as a frog-man was in a black space, sitting on greenish soapstone cyclopean masonry and playing the harmonica.  

As the PCs are chit-chatting, the frog dude whips out a thermal detonator and throws it through the portal at the PCs.  Quick thinking and even quicker reflexes sent ST's foot on a one-way mission to thermal detonator town.  He kicked it back through the portal and it exploded.  

What was left of the frog-man was soon no more as he took out a dagger and began stabbing himself in the belly until finally death claimed his amphibian ass... perhaps as some half-assed, metagaming way of robbing the PCs of experience points?

That's where we'll end it today, my friends!  Thanks for reading, commenting, and sharing this where other gamers will either love or hate it.

Until next time... enjoy.  ;)

VS

p.s.  Yes, weekend badges are now available for July 2026's VENGER CON V: The Will To Power.  Want a great new TTRPG community where you can hang out with other gamers, get ideas, advice, and training in order to improve?  Look no further than the fastest-growing group on X - it's the Kult of Kort'thalis.  Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!