"I could slather something on that pocket-dog that'll make it sit up and bark at the lavender moons" - Hump-Day CHA'ALT Campaign Session Report

 

Sometimes, sacrifices must be made... and sometimes things just work out a certain way; happily coinciding like fate.

It's becoming clear now that our last session in "season 3" of our Cha'alt campaign was the actual end, as I suspected it might be.  And if you've been keeping tabs, last Wednesday night I tried to start what would be a long-term (West Marches style, so whoever shows up gets to play in a loose, player-directed series of adventures) virtual Roll20 game set in Cha'alt.

Me telling folks that I want to run a one-shot 24-hours (or even less) whenever I had free time was not working.  I'd get a small handful of people signing-up, and then usually one player would actually show, resulting in another canceled session.  Not cool.

I did what I've been having to do lately, think smarter, be cunning, and use the sly-man approach.  I mean, in this instance, I just did the next logical step - set up a regular weekly game that's always-on so folks can prepare for it and know that it's going to be there as a permanent fixture.  If a dozen or so gamers are aware of Wednesday night's game, that increases the likelihood of getting enough players to play.

Sidenote, it looks like VENGER CON will remain a small but dedicated gaming convention for the hardcore several who keep coming back for more.  Scaling it down allows it to not lose money (first couple years broke-even, but going to the newer, nicer venue has seen a small financial loss the last two years), and I don't have to stress about not selling enough badges to pay for itself.  I can focus on what VENGER CON should be about - pushing oneself to create a fantastic gaming experience so awesome and profound that it changes the medium forever.  That's the kind of cultural significance I'd like to manifest.

Ok, back to the Wednesday night (9:30 - 11:00pm) virtual Cha'alt campaign.  Last week didn't work out (only one player again), but I kept at it because it was important to put this in motion and keep it going until it started paying out.  We had 3 players last night, my second attempt at starting the hump-day campaign.  Success!

I'm going to give folks the gist and highlight a few phrases from last night's game, which is easy to do since my virtual sessions are text-only.  I can simply re-read and copy/paste the sort of things I wish I could fully remember when playing live face-to-face (though, I do take notes for the session reports that follow).  I'm going to follow this brief session report up with info on how I'm running Divine Favor, because what I'm doing now is different and I want my players, as well as, those taking a keen interest in Cha'alt, to know what's up.

Ok, the three players were ST-K1 or The Saint, an assassin droid gone rogue who's become a mechanical soldier of fortune (warrior).  ST can feel when magic is afoot.  I've GMed ST-K1 several times, both on Roll20 and VENGER CON.  Ka'az Shoro is a swashbuckling blue-velvet elven thief and ladies man who loathes real work.  Then, we had Vor'sarkh, a droid sorcerer who's also a Cthulhu worshiper.  Everyone started at 3rd level with max HP.

The opening crawl... or scrawl, I should say, since it's just an introductory block of text setting the stage...

In a time before and yet also after time, there had been a universe containing the inestimable Cha'alt. Desert planet; aya'ahuasca-flavored popsicles; fuchsia sky, worms everywhere, weird shit, man. Twin suns so hot they'll make your worm's neck penis blister in the shade. Yeah, that's how hot it is. 

The three of you haven't known each other long, but find yourselves this night in the Burnt Umber Jackal-Worm, a shitty cantina in the bad part of town. However, it's got one thing that most dives don't - three stripper poles in the sunken stage area towards the back, carpeted with neon-pink leopard. 

Ok, tell me what you're currently doing in the cantina and either who you're with or what's on your mind.  BTW, you're all 3rd level in this dimension - the yellow electric banana dimension.

There was a lot of conversation, banter back-and-forth, and getting a lay of the land... in more ways than one.

Ka'az wanted to get his sleaze factor-5 bonus on, and started talking to the ladies.  The Saint was playing the kalimba for anyone interested in hearing it.  Vor'sarkh was a former custodial droid forced to clean toilets for a Cthulhu cult out in the deep desert.  As he had recently escaped, he was looking for money in order to survive.

The techno dark ambient dub-step with repurposed Lord GaGa's vocals spliced over the top via A.I. drowns out your kalimba, sadly.  The bartender keeps eyeing the two organics, expecting you to eventually order a drink. "You sad-sacks gonna drink something or just sit there looking like a horny incel on blue dreamers?"

As the PCs ogled the strippers and started making moves (including ST attempting to interface with a filthy, slutty financial computer), a patron of sorts entered the scene...

After several minutes of digital degradation, and the bartender condescending your manhoods as he shakes his head, a demon approaches. He's got a full black beard and a sack full of coins. "I've heard someone over here might be interested in making some real money."

He gives you a smarmy, self-satisfied smile before telling you how simple the job is. There are ruins to the north about an hour's journey on foot, swallowed by the desert years ago. Earlier this evening, a few men came in here talking about something they saw in the Seena-Ellistra'ad ruins, something with a unique coloration not seen on Cha'alt for millennia. Bring back whatever it is, whatever has that otherworldly hue, and all this gold - gold, mind you, not talons - shall be yours to share."

When asked what the exact color is, and how big, heavy, or transportable this colorful object might be, the demon responded...

"It would be impossible for a lowly servant of Kort'thalis , such as myself, to describe. But it has been said the color is like dwindling twilight just before the violent end to a disappointing universe.  A source has told me that the object, whatever it is, can be held... or wielded, either one or two-handed."

After a few more shenanigans, they headed out into the desert at night to find the Seena-Ellistra'ad ruins.  A chatty midnight-elf had followed them out of the cantina and kept talking to them as they trekked through the sand.  Sharing fun-facts such as...

 "Seena-Ellistra'ad is the Niagara Falls of the S'kbah desert, they say."  And, "Did you know that twerking was first invented on Cha'alt? That's how the women-folk used to call sandworms."

So much worldbuilding going on!  Cha'alt is growing exponentially, it seems.  More stage setting...

As you walk amongst the magenta-turned-violet night sky, under the ascending lavender moons, the sound of an ululating sandworm catches your ears. It could be far-off, but there's no way of knowing with the desert's echoes.

Eventually, the PCs noticed a pylon to the west and they investigated.  A humanoid in black robes was guarding the open entrance.  The PCs tried talking to him, but he was all about the guarding, cutting deep into Vor'sarkh's hip and outer-thigh with a magical scimitar, almost severing his mechanical leg.  The Saint and Ka'az made short work of him, flanking the guard with sneak-attacks.

Vor purposefully broke the 4th wall to tell the GM (henceforth known in the hump-day Cha'alt campaign as Sofa King) that he felt no pain.  I awarded him a point of Divine Favor for that, but he was still badly wounded and no priest.  Ka'az casually mentioned that droids could heal when powering-down and dreaming of electric sheep.  Hey, works for me!

Inside, was an indigo-blue light flashing.  ST went inside to check it out, seeing an elven sorceress zapping the matrix table with her wand.  The Saint tried to explain the rationality of SCIENCE to her, but she insulted him and continued.  

That's where we ended the session.  In the moment, it can be a little hard to follow what everyone is saying, as there will be times that I'm typing a response to someone, and in that time, two or more players have chimed-in, and yeah.  If I missed anything as we play, don't be afraid to remind me when I've neglected to reply to what you've posted.  

Divine Favor

I used to give everyone starting Divine Favor right off the bat, but now that there are so many ways to earn it, I'd rather keep DF as an incentivizing tool.  Ok, here are all the ways of earning Divine Favor...

• Breaking the 4th wall in an amusing, interesting, or poignant way.
• Stimulating a Cha'alt X-Card.
• Doing something amazingly hilarious and/or awesome, above and beyond all the amazing, hilarious and awesome things that PCs are routinely doing.
• Rolling the Zeeku die (the d6 that accompanies d20 rolls to determine if that action coincides with either a complication or opportunity) in which the result is a 1.  Yeah, I'm going to make Zeeku optional and up to players themselves to remember, since I don't feel like policing everyone's d20 rolls throughout the campaign - I've got too much on my plate for that.
• Stroking the proverbial sandworm as one whispers their inner-thoughts like in the 1984 Dune voice-over [yes, this is new... something I've been thinking about for the last couple weeks].  
• Implementing the gilded die of Satanis, which I'm in the process of retooling for virtual games.  Something like, if you succeed, some kind of awkward, embarrassing, cringe side-effect occurs during your attempted action.  But if you fail, nothing embarrassing happens at all.
• And whatever I decide to add to this list as the hump-day Cha'alt campaign continues.  I'll probably come up with something on a session-by-session basis, like creating and implementing another layer to your character's backstory.

Incidentally, it occurred to me that not only should DF be bankable (saved for later), but borrowed.  Let's say, you need to burn some DF right now but don't have any stored up... and want to save the Cha'alt X-Card or whatever for a later date.  You can use it now, even though you're earning it later (that spent-ahead-of-time point gets immediately burned).  

If you haven't earned DF that you've already spent by the session's end, you "go into debt."  Which will probably result in some kind of hilariously awful penalty exacted upon your PC at the start of the next session.

Ok, next hump-day session will be the following Wednesday from 9:30 - 11:00pm via Roll20 (text-only and 18+).  I'll announce when the next session's listing is online (first on the Kult of Kort'thalis community on X, then the rest of X and FB.  

Thanks for reading, hoss!

VS

p.s.  Yes, weekend badges are now available for July 2026's VENGER CON V: The Will To Power.  Want a great new TTRPG community where you can hang out with other gamers, get ideas, advice, and training in order to improve?  Look no further than the fastest-growing group on X - it's the Kult of Kort'thalis.  Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  

"It would be a terrible tragedy for the universe if it suddenly turned out that I was colorblind" - CHA'ALT Campaign 3.13

 

Coming off the heels of VENGER CON IV: Post-Modern Apocalypse (if you haven't seen the blog post), I was on the road to recovery... having gotten sick the last day of the convention and making steady progress every day since.

I found out the morning of our Cha'alt campaign that we'd be down another player (the one who played in that half-session with my son a couple weeks back) due to food poisoning.  With only 3 players showing up - none of whom had every played it - I decided to run Hunted In Tenzarith - modified here and there.  I felt like an isolated "bottle episode" of a session would be ideal, given the circumstances.

The biggest modification was the PCs being chosen for a mission by The Guardian.  An extra-dimensional being, he set the adventurers in a drow prison near the Caves of Carnage as they were to find a crystal that was part of a gleaming, transparent cube hidden somewhere in that cave-system.

Each player got to determine what color / dimension in the skinematic Vengerverse their character du jour originated from.  So, we had purple-Bandersnatch, purple-Tinker, and I suppose purple-Black Francis (since this was only his second session and his first appearance was in purple-Cha'alt).

Soon enough, the PCs broke out, released an infernal beholder (who kindly disintegrated their slave collars in exchange for his freedom), and found their stuff - plus, a bit more.  The Zeeku narrative game mechanics were in full effect as purple-Bandersnatch rolled a 1 on his d20 and a 1 on his accompanied d6.  The first thing he found was a black skull that radiated magic.  The skull, Wilzon, talked to him psychically, telling the blue-suede elf sorcerer that he didn't need any of that other junk (stuff like his blaster, magical weapons, etc.)  "Just take the origami unicorn... that's enough.  I'm all you'll ever need."

Following a failed saving throw, the black skull had successfully possessed Bandersnatch.  Luckily, the sorcerer summoned his faithful familiar, Tiny Danzig.  After talking with Wilzon, Tiny Danzig realized the black skull would be detrimental to his master, and threw the skull on the ground, smashing it into several pieces.  

The spell broken, the sorcerer gathered up all his belongings, and they hauled ass out of there - oh but not before searching the descending stone staircase to find a half-woman (with rockin' tits) and half-spider statue holding aloft a glowing purple orb.  There were a bunch of giant spiders down there, too, so once they got the orb, they finally left the dungeon.

The streets of Tenzarith were filled with backstabbing and betrayal, as you'd imagine.  I used the priestess of Lolth massage parlor encounter which I've employed a half-dozen times, now.  Usually, with slight variations.  This time, no one was murdered, only a precious necklace was stolen as Black Francis was invisible and snuck in to steal it.

Meanwhile, the priestess used a form of sexual healing to bring the magic-spent sorcerer back up to full (or near enough) HP.  Once the thievery was over and Black Francis was paid with a storm opal, the dark elf female fled into the night.  There was an amusing discussion started by Black Francis, dismayed that a "7" was running away.  I assured everyone that this being my world, on Cha'alt, 7s, 8s, and 9s, were rather commonplace.  "You'd be hard-pressed to find a 4 in this campaign, hoss."

Continuing on, the PCs not wasting time assisting their fellow prisoners escape re-capture at the hands of drow guards, they passed the food truck "Chicken of the Poisoned Blade."  The in-joke started with another group last weekend continued - "Wait?  Is the chicken poisoned?  How many customers are fine with eating at a place with poison right there in the name?"  A lot, apparently, as there was a line 6 or 7 deep.

Tinker got a dish of mango-pineapple BBQ "chicken," and it was as sweet, spicy, and tasty as you could get.  Incidentally, I did a write-up of the games I'll be running at Gary Con next year (in March), and it includes a session where the food truck has expanded into a mid-tier, chain-style restaurant and the PCs work there.  Kind of Office Space meets Waiting... in Cha'alt.  

Ok, the PCs made it into the Caves of Carnage.  After sifting through trash and chatting with a vagrant searching the mounds of garbage, the adventurers were waylaid by bandits.  Black Francis' player was rolling poorly, which I attributed to the drow poison coursing through his veins.  To aid him, I reminded the table about the Cha'alt X-Cards.  Stimulate one of those and you get a point of Divine Favor.  

The Pop-Culture card was stimulated, and Hulk Hogan came out from the back of the cave to put one of the dark elf bandits in a choke-hold, giving the PCs the upper hand.

They tried to make a deal with some fellow prisoners in a cave attempting to loot a few crystals, asking them if they'd seen a cube-shaped crystal or something that would be part of that.  No luck, so they continued on.  

Although, now that I recall those events, the PCs threatened the escaped prisoners to walk ahead of them (like sheep through a minefield) or die.  So, I suppose they now have an entourage of three to take the front position. 

Sexy dark elf women tried to lure the PCs into their cave of slut cannibalism, but the PCs resisted.  Bandersnatch didn't have to roll since he'd received a BJ from the priestess of Lolth but an hour ago.

And that's where we ended things.  Since it had been so long since we'd gotten together (chatting at the beginning), and stopped a bit early, that's as far as we got.  

I've got more Guardian intrigue in store for everyone when we reconvene.  Not sure if we're playing next week or the week after.  The wife is away visiting her parents in Florida, so maybe it's best to game right away this Saturday?  Hmm...

Before I go, I painted something in the days between VENGER CON and running our Saturday Cha'alt campaign - it's the glyph of Kort'thalis, titled "Infernal Tentacles of Kort'thalis Drip Tribal Blood in many Hues... Orange in Particular."  

I was inspired by some nice comments (including Sandy Petersen and his wife) about the paintings I brought in for VENGER CON.  This painting now sits behind me in the computer room.  It turned out just as I had hoped.  

BTW, I do have something special coming Friday, August 1st...  (silly teaser video).  I don't know what kind of impact it'll have on the TTRPG world, but it's called Kult of Kort'thalis!

Thanks for reading.  Hope you enjoyed it.  Feel free to ask a question or post a comment below.

VS

p.s. p.s. Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!