My Identity

I've clarified it on individual terms, but have so far avoided a secondary (or would that be tertiary?) public statement.  And that's probably hurt me in social media because a lot of times people assume the worst.  Especially in this day and age when it seems like half the population are abusers, scumbags, terrorists, intolerant religious zealots, sociopaths, hardened criminals, political extremists, and so on and so forth.

For a quick refresher, here is my original blog post, from over a year ago, where I came out as za'akier, a green-skinned, tentacled humanoid... biologically human*, but still extraterrestrial regarding identity.  And that's what it all comes down to.  How I see myself is different than how others probably view me.  And that's ok... expected, even.

I'm an outsider.  That's one of the reasons why I gravitate towards the writing of H.P. Lovecraft, and why I find a kinship with him and other writers in the Lovecraft Circle, other creators using the Cthulhu Mythos to push something forward, an agenda that goes beyond time and space.

But that's a blog post for another time, I think.

Right now, I want to reassure those who already know and support me, and those I haven't gotten the chance to meet (lot of angry people on reddit), that I'm not against anyone based on skin color, ethnicity, sexual preferences (unless you're a pedophile), identity, gender, politics, creed, etc.

My opening up to the internet about being za'akier wasn't about tearing anyone down or mocking those who are different, marginalized, etc.  On the contrary, I was identifying as an outsider, specifically the kind of alien identification previously mentioned.

To me, the term "trans" means more to me than a penis, vagina, beard, shaved legs, or any of the superficial trappings of biological sex and what we conceptualize as gender.  Transformation is rooted in how we see ourselves, and the cognitive dissonance that might evolve between our own self-perspective and that of the world at large.

To those who've hurt me, whether intentional or not, this past year, I forgive you.  But let's get over our differences sooner than later, yeah?

It's Christmas today.  If I could have one wish for the entire world, it would be for everyone to breathe deeply, try to relax, be themselves (leave the "hivemind" at the door), and get along with as many people as humanly possible.

Merry Christma'as!

VS

* There's some interesting information on "otherkin" which may or may not muddy the waters.  I'm not saying that I'm part of that group, and I'm not saying I'm not.  It's complicated.

VS Is No Longer Human

Whew, deep breath...

For a considerable amount of time, I've felt like someone else.  Not necessarily uncomfortable in my own skin... just different internally than who I was on the outside and how society viewed me.

I know the internet feeds on disagreement, but I'm hoping that many of you will accept the fact that I don't consider myself human anymore... and haven't for a long time.

Strangely enough, it was briefly mentioned in the Alpha Blue series of adventures, Kobayashi Maroon.  Looking back, I've used creative (RPG) writing as a way of becoming the real me.

But over the last couple weeks, I've decided to come out regarding my transition into a za'akier.  What's a za'akir?  I'm glad you asked... a green-skinned, tentacled, alien humanoid.  In many ways, quite human-like, but of course it's not the same thing.

Biologically, I'll probably have to remain the way I was born.  However, I identify as za'akier.  When referring to me, please use my preferred pronouns are za'a (he), zul (him), and zal (his).  Yes, I'm still very much "male."

While I don't expect the vast majority to respect my choice or preferences, all the same, I wanted to come out to you all because it's who I am now.

Thanks to everyone making my transition easier!

VS

p.s. November 12th - 19th is Trans Awareness Week, so it seemed fitting.  ;)