Wednesday, December 25, 2019

My Identity


I've clarified it on individual terms, but have so far avoided a secondary (or would that be tertiary?) public statement.  And that's probably hurt me in social media because a lot of times people assume the worst.  Especially in this day and age when it seems like half the population are abusers, scumbags, terrorists, intolerant religious zealots, sociopaths, hardened criminals, political extremists, and so on and so forth.

For a quick refresher, here is my original blog post, from over a year ago, where I came out as za'akier, a green-skinned, tentacled humanoid... biologically human*, but still extraterrestrial regarding identity.  And that's what it all comes down to.  How I see myself is different than how others probably view me.  And that's ok... expected, even.

I'm an outsider.  That's one of the reasons why I gravitate towards the writing of H.P. Lovecraft, and why I find a kinship with him and other writers in the Lovecraft Circle, other creators using the Cthulhu Mythos to push something forward, an agenda that goes beyond time and space.

But that's a blog post for another time, I think.

Right now, I want to reassure those who already know and support me, and those I haven't gotten the chance to meet (lot of angry people on reddit), that I'm not against anyone based on skin color, ethnicity, sexual preferences (unless you're a pedophile), identity, gender, politics, creed, etc.

My opening up to the internet about being za'akier wasn't about tearing anyone down or mocking those who are different, marginalized, etc.  On the contrary, I was identifying as an outsider, specifically the kind of alien identification previously mentioned.

To me, the term "trans" means more to me than a penis, vagina, beard, shaved legs, or any of the superficial trappings of biological sex and what we conceptualize as gender.  Transformation is rooted in how we see ourselves, and the cognitive dissonance that might evolve between our own self-perspective and that of the world at large.

To those who've hurt me, whether intentional or not, this past year, I forgive you.  But let's get over our differences sooner than later, yeah?

It's Christmas today.  If I could have one wish for the entire world, it would be for everyone to breathe deeply, try to relax, be themselves (leave the "hivemind" at the door), and get along with as many people as humanly possible.

Merry Christma'as!

VS

* There's some interesting information on "otherkin" which may or may not muddy the waters.  I'm not saying that I'm part of that group, and I'm not saying I'm not.  It's complicated.

7 comments:

  1. My go-to book on the subject of otherness has to be Scott R Jones "When the Stars are Right." Essentially, he tells us that the universe is unknowable, and possibly meaningless. We create our own authenticity, so be your authentic self, Venger, as long as you keep making things like Cha'alt.

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    1. Thanks, hoss. I appreciate that, and will, of course. ;)

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  2. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  3. "Especially in this day and age when it seems like half the population are abusers, scumbags, terrorists, intolerant religious zealots, sociopaths, hardened criminals, political extremists, and so on and so forth."

    And these are the people identify as "activists" and think they are the "good guys".

    "I'm an outsider. That's one of the reasons why I gravitate towards the writing of H.P. Lovecraft, and why I find a kinship with him and other writers in the Lovecraft Circle, other creators using the Cthulhu Mythos to push something forward, an agenda that goes beyond time and space."

    This is what is killing fandom. Geek and Nerd hobbies were rooted in being the outsider. The older you are amongst these groups the more you faced bullying and "socialization", which forced many of us to enjoy are fandom secretly. Now we are not only mainstream, but cool and the types of people who did bully us are now sitting at the table with us and the younger set may have faced a different path to get here. And it's good for them, but some of us aren't ready to be cool or we'd have done it when we were teenagers. And all of this is compounded by an assumption that if I play D&D and you play D&D then we can be friends, which is often not the case. And finally, fandom suffers from the fact one way to be an outsider about your favorite thing is to hate it and wish X would take it over. In short, humanity, as a species, sucks, but individually some of us are alright.

    Fly your freak flag, you only got one chance in life and the whole thing is both much shorter and much longer than we want.

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    1. Thanks for the comment and blog post, my friend.

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  4. Word, Venger.

    You never need to define yourself nor need to define others and identity is fluid and can change.

    Keep the lasagna flying and the nuclear creativity flowing

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  5. Personally, I've identified as an Ancient Martian Replicant/Robot since I was a child. To each their own; one of my favorite Millennial meme/comic quotes is "Shhh, let people enjoy things."

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