Opportunities & Complications

 

As mentioned in my latest video, I'm trying out this new "narrative die" game mechanic in our upcoming session (Cha'alt 3.12).  

Well, it's new to me.  Apparently, this has been around for a long time and is used by several RPGs already.

Basically, you roll a d6 along with your d20.  If the d6 results in a 1, there's a complication.  If it's a 6, there's an opportunity.  And the d20 decides if you (crit) succeed or (crit) fail, as usual.

As the GM, I'll be rolling this narrative die, as well, for monsters, NPCs, and whatever else.

After this trial session, the opportunity / complication d6 - I need to come up with a catchy name for it; ironically, "narrative die" doesn't really tell any kind of a story - will become optional for whoever wants to continue the practice.  I'll probably award a bonus Divine Favor for those who keep up with it each session, to mitigate the potential downside the game mechanic yields.

In preparation, I thought it would be handy to come up with a few default suggestions for both opportunities and complications.  Obviously, these things are situational and depend on the condition, context, and present circumstances.  But in the moment, it's also nice to have a go-to narrative detail.

Opportunity

• Some sort of feat, mighty deed, or stunt is possible.
• An additional 6 points of damage during an attack.
• If the attack was unsuccessful, a mere 6 points of damage is done via glancing blow or skin-deep cut.
• You have a moment of clarity, and are able to see things for what they really are.
• You notice your opponent is standing under a precarious stalactite. 
• If already successful, the attack becomes a crit.
• You get an attack of opportunity.
• If a saving throw is required, it's rolled with Advantage for you or Disadvantage for your opponent.
• Advantage on your next action.
• A PC or NPC is able to provide support, help, or aid.
• A weakness, flaw, tell, or new understanding appears.
• "A plan comes together" - if the PCs have a plan in place, the necessary missing piece of the puzzle suddenly falls into place.
• A resource renews or becomes available for the first time.
• Massive hit knocks opponent unconscious.
• If it's a weaker opponent, the attack outright kills them.
• PC's ferocity makes one or more opponents run away.
• You make it look easy.
• Someone watching becomes enamored of you.
• Your grace, skill, or ridicule unsteadies an opponent, giving them Disadvantage.
• You happen to be at a ley-line crossroads that rejuvenate, heal, or strengthen magic.
• Opponent's weapon, device, instrument, or whatever breaks, runs out of ammo, juice, charges, etc.
• There's a substantial crystal within view.
• They planned to spring a trap, but you either saw right through it or it failed.
• The Gods smile on you once again... that Orion whore you laid with did not have space herpes.
• Your belt is slashed and your pants fall down - red heart underwear activated!

Complication

• Reinforcements enter the fray.
• An ally runs away.
• If a saving throw is required, it's rolled at a Disadvantage to you or Advantage to your opponent.
• Your fazed by the sheer strength of their attack and get Disadvantage on your next action.
• You drop something.
• You have an allergic reaction to something nearby.
• You suddenly realize this isn't your enemy's final form.
• The enemy gets an attack of opportunity on you.
• One of your companions pulls a "wild card" on your group.
• Ammo, energy, fuel, juice, magic, or mojo runs out.
• Your war-scream has lured a wandering monster into environment.
• Just before dealing the killing-blow, your opponent uses his "one time," get out of jail free card, ring of teleportation, cloak of invisibility, or Predator camouflage armor to slip away and fight another day.
• Your opponent is immune to that form of attack, or has learned how to counter it, or adapted in order to make such attacks ineffective.
• Your mind plays tricks, you have a moment of confusion, or you're just getting old.
• An environmental hazard like a Cha'alt-quake, volcanic eruption, cave-in, or poisonous gas happens.
• Your opponent somehow knows something about you, an important detail that could lead to your undoing.
• Your bad back, knee, hip, elbow, or fractured tibula is flaring up again.  You're gonna need to sit out for a few minutes.
• You happen to be your opponent's favored enemy - they get Advantage when attacking you.
• The thing you need to protect is (almost) destroyed.
• A random NPC appears through a portal and smacks you across the face with a fish.  You're dazed for one round.
• Your weapon, device, or whatever you're carrying vibrates, ricochets, recoils, spits, chirps, reverbs, glistens, pulses, explodes, echoes, thrums, or belches fire and it somehow negatively impacts you.
• Whoops, that blade is poisoned... make your save or nighty-night.
• A trap was laid for you, and now it has sprung. 
• That three-breasted hooker has a dead-eye pimp who walks around with a thermal detonator.

____________

So, yeah... those are just some things that occurred to me as I sat down to type this blog post out.  I tried to come up with both in-combat and out-of-combat ideas.

You can use Divine Favor or say the phrase "By His loathsome tentacles" to reroll or bump your d6 narrative die, respectively.  Speaking of "By His loathsome tentacle," I'll allow players to shout "Cha'alt!" instead, if they'd rather say that in order to get a +1 on a die result.

If your a Daggerheart or Genesys RPG player and get some use out of this, remember to support small-time, independent content creators.

Enjoy,

VS

p.s. Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  Want to join the Kort'thalis mailing list to stay up-to-date on what's going on in the skinematic Vengerverse?  This is it!!  Last but not least, I'm organizing a based-as-fuck RPG convention in Madison, WI this July (Sandy Petersen will be joining us as VENGER CON's Guest of Honor).  Grab your weekend badge for VENGER CON IV: Post-Modern Apocalypse!!!

Cult Classic Influence: Heathers

 

For a long while, I've been using this blog for either session reports or announcements... product releases, crowdfunding, conventions, culture war politics, etc.  Which means I've been slacking on the gaming content front.  

Well, I came up with something to boost my blogging output and heighten its appeal - while also giving me yet another reason (aside from introducing vintage media to my kids) to revisit such cult classics as Blade Runner, Zardoz, Flash Gordon, Revenge of the Nerds, and Highlander, to name but a few.  

As long as I'm enjoying all the foundational cult classics that have inspired me over the years (including Cha'alt and other products), why not dig deep, deriving (even more, in some cases) campaign setting bits and pieces to make the world come alive?  Not just lore that adds a hint of color, but something tangible, mechanical, or substantive that is directly inspired by what I just watched... something that makes a difference to the players, that the GM can use, not just describe.

My goal is to put out one of these each week (and some weeks I might blog a TV show write-up).  While that might not be realistic, I'm going to try and keep to that schedule.  I'll be on a family vacation next week, so that's already shot, but don't worry, I won't give up!  

Want to motivate me?  I love feedback - especially when folks tell me how they used it in-game.  Last night, I watched Heathers (again) with my oldest, and so without further ado...

Cult Classic Influence #1: Heathers

Anytime the PCs come into contact with (hearing about, setting foot inside, staying there for a little while, and perhaps exiting) a matriarchal society - like the city-state of Ja'alette or Chud-Letha'az, the gilded mauve dark-elf city - or any culture where women are at least equal to or above men, the GM is obliged to come up with a feminine scheme.

Generally speaking, this feminine scheme comes directly from the "Queen Bee" herself, but possibly her subordinates... and on the rarest of occasions, the female drones rebel against her royal highness, either toppling her jeweled crown or their failed attempt merely incites deadly retaliation - "Off with their heads!"

Most importantly, the feminine scheme must show strength, be cruel in nature, and include an aspect of humiliation and/or degradation.  

For example, the Golden Goddess forces her least productive handmaids to fully inhale the magenta lotus which temporarily turns them into "free-use" sluts who will do anything with anyone, anywhere.  As the masculine slaves ravage them, the Golden Goddess and her Priestesses watch from their ivory balconies.  

Now that we have the what, how could this be incorporated into one's game?  I have some ideas...

Maybe the PCs hear a rumor of what will eventually go down, what's already taken place, or happening right now... are the PCs participating?  Perhaps they see the results for themselves or a feminine scheme fugitive runs away, falling into the arms of the reluctant adventurers?  What if the PCs get swept up in the scheme, or one of their friends?  What if it doesn't directly affect the PCs at all, but it goes to show (rather than tell) how messed up their society really is?  How does this alter their relationship with their neighboring city, settlement, or realm?  If everyone's distracted, will they take the opportunity to attack?  Steal that coveted artifact?  Will this stunning and brave display of feminized degeneracy make them less likely to interfere in female-dominated politics?  Going an alternative route, is it possible that bend-over-backwards kindness results in suicidal empathy, leading to the downfall of their civilization?

__________

Ok, if you enjoyed that, let me know.  I probably won't blog again until after I get back from vacation, so comment down below if you want to make a suggestion.  And thanks for tuning-in, hoss!

Enjoy,

VS

p.s. Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  Want to join the Kort'thalis mailing list to stay up-to-date on what's going on in the skinematic Vengerverse?  This is it!!  Last but not least, I'm organizing a based-as-fuck RPG convention in Madison, WI this July (Sandy Petersen will be joining us as VENGER CON's Guest of Honor).  Grab your weekend badge for VENGER CON IV: Post-Modern Apocalypse!!!

"The Somewhat Purple Bastards" - CHA'ALT 3.11

 

Yes, this is going to be another weird one... and it all takes place on purple-Cha'alt.

Botsterdomus' player couldn't make it because of work related issues, but we had a new player try our game out.  So, still the full compliment of 5.

  As I understand it, the last time our guest-player took part in D&D you had character classes like fighter, magic-user, elf, and dwarf.

He decided to play a dark-elf thief named Black Francis with lavender teardrops tattooed upon his deep-purple skin, just below his eye.  That was his noteworthy thing, and I also told him that he owed his life to the Purple Supreme Council (I started him at 3rd level so he wasn't a wuss compared to the others who were between 4th and 5th level).  He started out in a nearby cave, hidden and counting his loot when the PCs strolled in to check things out.

Moments later, they saw a flash of darkest periwinkle, heard a weird noise, and a familiar voice telling them to drop their weapons.  It was the Darkest Periwinkle Bastards (as opposed to the Crimson Bastards or Purple Bastards).  So, the PCs from another dimension or universe (but in darkest periwinkle) came to purple-Cha'alt to steal their weapons and who knows what else?

The Darkest Periwinkle Bastards had a device (held by darkest periwinkle Bandersnatch - Thurberus had a darkest periwinkle pyramid with AMWAY written on it, because he always has some kind of business / cult scam going, Lol) that immobilized the PCs.  

Oh yeah, I wrote down speaking parts for a couple players to read for their doppelgangers.  As they were about to steal the weapons from their paralyzed selves, the would-be thieves decided to monolog about how they got here, murdering and cutting up the Darkest Periwinkle Supreme Council so they could be easily digested by Botsterdomus' darkest periwinkle anal worms.

That was all the motivation Black Francis needed to come out of the shadows, creep up behind Bandersnatch, and slit his throat.  Rolling high on his sneak-attack damage, darkest periwinkle Bandersnatch gripped his neck as the blood spurted and the device fell to the ground and broke.  Before that, Bandersnatch-prime attempted to use his psionic abilities to disrupt the device.  Partially successful, he made it go on and off like a strobe-light.

Now completely free, combat ensued.  It didn't take much for the PCs to best their darkest periwinkle selves.  Not wanting the moral weight of killing oneself, Thurberus merely knocked his mirror image back into the darkest periwinkle portal with his shake-weight.  Being an agent of chaos - I should say agents of chaos - purple-Tinker and darkest periwinkle Tinker traded places as the pixie-fairy poontang is always a more favorable hue on the other side of the portal.  However, the new Tinker got a shot off with his sorcerer-bard companion's bass guitar that was pre-loaded with a darkest periwinkle fireball, wounding Thurberus the most - but everyone, except Black Francis - took some damage.

By the end, all the bodies were looted (Bandersnatch acquired 9 darkest periwinkle crystals from his counterpart), Thurberus held a dagger up to darkest periwinkle's neck and a blaster trained on Black Francis because he was coming for the new Tinker in order to avenge the Supreme Council that the Darkest Periwinkle Bastards had been bragging about murdering only a few minutes earlier.  

Confused yet?  Lol.  It all pretty much got straightened out enough to continue on to the wine tasting / timeshare pitch that was happening a few caves over.  

Before getting there, Bandersnatch felt the aura of evil magic coming from a side cave.  They found a way to breach the force shield and entered to find a Ms. Pacman coffee table style arcade game, lava lamp, infernal glyph drawn upon the floor, and a curious machine at the back that said a numeric code had to be entered and button pushed or else there would be a "catastrophic planetary shutdown."  When first glanced, there was 7 minutes and 43 seconds remaining.  By the time they found the code, there was 1 minute and 11 seconds.  Thurberus did all he could to destroy the machine and evidence of the code before leaving, as the machine re-set for one million seconds.  I just looked up how long that is...  11 days, 13 hours, 46 minutes, and 40 seconds.

After that was the wine tasting hosted by a mutant named Scum Weasel (yes, he looked like a humanoid weasel).  He had several guards, a few small sandworms, over a dozen patrons drinking his delicious twice-peed wine, a sack of money and IOUs, and handful of beautiful women.  Scum Weasel explained his "hot chick filtration" system of which he was so proud.  You see, once you move the sandworm's fat out of the way to find his neck-penis, and pour that into a glass, you then have your hot chick drink it... then you wait about 30 minutes, and when she eventually pisses it out you have the best tasting worm wine on Cha'alt.  

The new Tinker, we decided, had an amulet that could turn him into a 7-foot darkest periwinkle worm, and he went to work putting the moves on one of Scum Weasel's sandworms.  Turns out, Tinker's seduction was successful.  He had her take him to Scum Weasel's "bedroom cave."  After about 20 minutes, they came back.  Tinker announced that Scum Weasel was hoarding scratch-off lottery tickets.  Thurberus was amazed and impressed by his business plan (of course), so they stole the 17 tickets yet to be scratched-off, no winners were among the tickets littering his abode, killed the few guards who didn't immediately surrender, zapped Scum Weasel with the wand of lightning, and took off with all the valuables.  

The next cave was divided by a portcullis.  Tinker flew in to see what was happening, found a two-headed dragon, decided to betray the party by leading them into the dragon's den, was found out by Bandersnatch, and eventually (after feeding about 8 humanoids to the dragon) turned invisible thanks to Bandersnatch (after drinking his vial of zoth), and led a tied-up Tinker out of the cave and into the next.  

Soon after, another weird scifi noise was heard as a bunch of nerds were transported into that cave.  One of them was named Gary and they all had uniforms with their name and FGS written on them.  This was the Federation Geek Squad.  The geeks asked if anyone in the party was named Isithar, but none were.  Moments later, a group of dark-elves came by to lead the FGS to Chud-Letha'az, the dark-elf gilded mauve city beneath Skra'ath cavern.  However, you could only get there by traversing a 7-mile stretch of dangerous tunnel.  

Isithar and his dark-elves would be grateful for the PCs' help escorting the FGS back to Chud-Letha'az.  And so it went.  Briefly, they encountered a reluctant band of bandits (analogous to The Orphans from the 1979 movie The Warriors), a golden rust-monster of sorts, a vibration surfing elf wearing a tie-dyed cloak and holding plutonium nyborg (which one of the theives stole) there was a sign notifying those who knew the dark-elf language of a ley-line intersecting the tunnel, a giant purple-scorpion who immediately killed the gold rust-monster which Tinker claimed as a pet and Thurberus decided to capture it in the rainbow-obsidian stone that transported one into a black room of hellish torture, and a newt fancier who was having fun with all his many newts.

Eventually, they reached the city of Chud-Letha'az.  There were two major factions - Isithar's House Drentreatise and House Purpria who looked rather unfriendly when the PCs and FGS arrived.  House Drentreatise were very interested in getting tech support for the alien technology recently discovered in their city.  

The Federation Geek Squad looked around for an hour or two while the PCs did other things, such as check out the bazaar.  Tinker found some wondrous daggers belonging to a shopkeeper who was trying to find a love connection for his daughter.  She was half dark-elf and half pixie-fairy.  Considered ugly by the standards of Chud-Letha'az and wearing many veils (just in case one of them should accidentally fall off), Tinker did what he had to do to earn a set of almost magical daggers that represented the story of the scorpion and the frog.

Bungalows were arranged, Black Francis took possession of the party's newly acquired non-binary slave, and a dinner party was offered by House Purpuria in the PCs' and FGS' honor.  Though, Isithar warned them it may be some kind of trap.  

By the end of the session, the PCs learned that the FGS would be able to repair the first bits of alien technology, which was planetary teleportation.  Given enough energy, anyone could be teleported to another part of Cha'alt and back again.

From movie references to tiny shake-weights to the business venture of designing and selling shake-weight thumpers for sandworm booty calls to the idea of being driven mad by the lack of hot, mutant, pixie-fairy women, this was an odd session.  It was fun playing with Black Francis and his player.  I'm not sure what he expected, but we can all reasonably assume he wasn't expecting this.  It's hard to put our Cha'alt campaign into words.  Like in The Matrix, no one can be told what Cha'alt is (like), especially the way I run it, you simply have to experience it for yourself.  

Although, Tinker's player said something which I found rather telling... before he knew what fantasy roleplaying was really about (ahead of trying it for himself) our game is what he thought it would be like.  But then when he actually got to play (in other peoples' games), it turned out not to be like that at all... but then with our game, that's what he had originally envisioned.  Fascinating!

Because I'm blowing through a couple of weekends back-to-back (family vacation), the next session won't be until Saturday, June 21st - 4 weeks from now.  It's been so long, we'll have to go back to Cha'alt-prime, I expect, and see what's happening there.

Thanks for reading, hoss!  If you have questions, just ask.  

Oh, my latest PDFs are up on DriveThruRPG - Fairy Dust and Play Like A Fucking Boss.  I've been blessed with tremendous players both in my home game and at the various gaming cons where I GM... such as VENGER CON IV: Post-Modern Apocalypse.  

The stuff I've learned by watching and interacting with a player pool one-thousand strong over the past 42 years has taught me many things.  That wisdom was distilled into Play Like A Fucking Boss (also a print-on-demand softcover on Amazon that includes Fairy Dust at the back of the book).  I know it will help you become the best player at any table.

Enjoy,

VS

p.s. Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  Want to join the Kort'thalis mailing list to stay up-to-date on what's going on in the skinematic Vengerverse?  This is it!!  Last but not least, I'm organizing a based-as-fuck RPG convention in Madison, WI this July (Sandy Petersen will be joining us as VENGER CON's Guest of Honor).  Grab your weekend badge for VENGER CON IV: Post-Modern Apocalypse!!!

"Follow That Old One" - CHA'ALT 3.10

 

"Every voyage has its own flavor," as Sinbad said in the 1973 film (which I recently re-watched for the nth time).

This session fulfills that prophecy.  Let's dive in and maybe you'll see what I mean...

We had only three players as our traveling playboy was hungover and Bandersnatch's player was celebrating his anniversary.  That means H'ork leveling up to 4th along with Tinker, and Thurberus, maintaining at 5th level, were there to carry forward the Purple Bastards' adventure in the land of purple-Cha'alt.

Just as last session all took place on Cha'alt-prime, this one only focused on purple-Cha'alt.  As we recapped events, Kurva'ak and his minions were slaughtered and the massive dimensional door to the Old One known as Igg-Yig-Yatha'ak (the dark effulgence) was still magically sealed. 

Kurva'ak's former wizard, Zerlin, who now worked for the PCs gave the adventurers two options - blow the magic seal open with something like the plasma reactor core or photon torpedo... or he could magically unseal it via sorcery.  However, that would take the ritual sacrifice of several humanoids - perhaps as many as 11.  After some serious math on the back of a napkin and then sexkerchief, Zerlin felt certain that no more than 9 would be needed when push came to shove or tentacles came to bloodletting, as the saying goes in Cha'alt.

The PCs let it be known that if Zerlin failed, so too would his limbs fail to remain attached to his body.  You know, just to keep him honest and attentive to detail.

Before anything else happened, a purple portal opened, a massive purple claw reached out through the portal, grabbed Bandersnatch, and withdrew back into the portal's purple-lit interior.  Before disappearing, the party's sorcerer threw the amulet out so they'd at least have a chance of controlling or influencing the Great Old One, should they succeed in awakening or freeing him from his prison / slumber.

As the portal stayed open, Thurberus threw a rock into it, hitting Aldous Sand.  Aldous talked with them and they all decided it would be better for him to become some sort of apprentice, rather than stay in the purple labyrinth any longer, practicing his music.

As the PCs explored the rest of this cave system for random humanoids to be sacrificed, a courier ran towards them shouting "Thurberus!"  Holding off on blasting him, they allowed the gray-elf to approach.  He had a scroll tube which the gray-elf opened to reveal issue #14 of Dark Priest Monthly.  

Taking possession of the magazine, Thurberus filled-out the subscription card to receive another 5 years of Dark Priest Monthly, not sure if the bill or subsequent issues would ever find him.  The courier took the card back to the publisher as the v'smm priest flipped through his new magazine.

It featured various ways of luring victims into vans, RVs, and mobile homes by offering valuables such as gold, ammo, and scratch & sniff stickers.  A sexy peach frutie wearing purple lingerie made the centerfold.  Ads for vintage toys of the 70s and 80s (which had the 3 and 4-inch action figures in Thurberus' pack all excited) peppered the slick glossy pages.  Last of all, there was an interview with a dark priest named Father Alfa'anzo who experimented with dimensional magic and lived in the purple labyrinth for years.  His biggest discovery is that other dimensions had their own maze of varying color.  When the PCs scanned the interview for info such as "Why do these labyrinths exist?" it was extraordinary light on details.  Basically, they just do.

Continuing the exploration, the PCs happened upon slaves mining caves for ulfire and jale.  Several male slaves were doing the actual mining while three females sat around, waiting for their own duties to perform - all of them wearing the familiar high-tech slave collars.  

Soon enough, the PCs hacked through the intestinal curtains, killed the guards, and got into a heated battle with the slavers themselves.  Thurberus' magical golden shield saved his ass from a couple critical-hits, bringing him eventually down to 2 HP, and H'ork almost single digits.  Even Tinker was wounded.  But eventually, the PCs triumphed, taking the still alive slavers, their slaves, a bunch of mined crystals and precious stones, along with several scratch & sniff stickers.  Score!

Keeping the head-slave mining, the PCs relieved some pipe-cleaning stress with the women, and then took all the slaves back to Zerlin who was waiting at the magically sealed gateway - but not before Tinker (to whom I passed a note) was revealed to be the purple Pimpernel (or purple pimple as he kept calling it) and saved a couple of aristocrats from Kra'adumek's purple pope and his lilac acolytes of doom who were hot on their trail.  

At first, it seemed like the two aristocrats from the purple city would be the first of many sacrifices, but Zeeder and Chempt were soon treated well, and put in communication with Jay-vax (sub-captain of the S.S. Motherfucker), that racoon from the starship who rescued the PCs from that prison ship long ago.

Zerlin tried his best to minimize the casualties as he worked his sorcery, harnessing the power of the jale and ulfire crystals, along with the warm and inviting flesh of slave girl #2, Korra (whom he fancied so much he took her as his own).  He got it down to 6 sacrifices.  That means the women and purple aristocrats were saved - huza'ah!

The door was unsealed.  H'ork used his half-orc strength to open it enough for them to walk in - it was a dark tomb where an impossibly huge creature lay dormant.  Glyphs carved into ornate walls lined the eldritch sepulcher, many unreadable.  Soon enough, it awakened, spoke briefly to the PCs (the 15% chance of the not-properly-activated ultra-telluric glyph didn't materialize), and left its tomb, breaking apart the cave-system's ceiling and crawling out into the fuchsia-skied desert wasteland north, towards Ka'alestine.

Deciding to follow Igg-Yig-Yatha'ak in their RV, the PCs and their entourage piled-in and took off down the sand.  Coming at them from the eastern side was a Ka'alestinian patrol of about 20 robed cutthroats, a couple of them riding a giant scorpion with a couple human slaves in tow.  Several jiha'adist warriors were holding heads on pikes, and behind them was a decent-sized territory ringed with headless humanoids impaled upon the bone stalks of gigantic insects that roam the wasteland at night.  The Ka'alestinians frequently do this, taking bits of land here and there until they can consolidate them into greater Ka'alestine.

Figuring they could outrun the jiha'adists, the PCs kept going in their RV.  After driving a couple hours (the Ka'alestinians far behind), the adventurers noticed a gathering of a dozen or more people off to the west, just outside the mouth of a cave. 

Getting out to see what was going on, they mingled with two distinct groups - one fancy dressed who were here for a wine tasting in the gilded mauve caves - known locally as Skra'ath Cavern - and the others looked like peasant rabble.  They were here to see-off 3 heroes who decided to "retire themselves" with the high honor of being eaten by the devourer worms - an annual festivity that occurs at Skra'ath Cavern.  

Those about to die usually give blessings, words of wisdom, and sometimes bestow a gift.  Curiously, there was one man clad in black who didn't fit the description of the others.  He looked a bit ruthless and when he tore apart a sand lobster and threw it behind him, a piece that hit one of the peasants almost caused a scuffle, but then the man who was hit immediately backed down after the man in black gave him the look.  The PCs decided to keep an eye on him as they also took part in the festivities. 

First was the heroes being eaten - Sanquen, ranger of the desert night; Bestia'al, a female known as the blood oath barbarian; and Zoffestry, a sorcerer and former vizir of Ka'alestine.  Life expectancy on Cha'alt pretty much tops-out at 69, and these three were well into their 70s.  They wanted a "good death," hence being eaten by the devourer worms.  The juices of death-berries (which grew in these caves) marinated in a large skull.  The heroes sipped the death-berry wine, which was said to prepare their souls for the journey.

Tinker decided to instigate a race war between the mauve folk and gold folk who lived together in Skra'ath Cavern.  Both races were rather small.  Apparently, there was a wizard who lived amongst them, and he used the mauve folk as his helpers, eventually convincing or compelling them to assist him in capturing the gold folk to use in his experiments.  The wizard died over a year ago, but the hard feelings survive.

Meanwhile, Thurberus and H'ork followed the man in black who showed them his magical short sword, figuring they were here for the same reason - to capture the soul-energy of the consumed "warriors" in a valuable object.  Kicking out the mauve and gold folk with the crystals they had planned to ensoul, the man in black, Varker, waited along with the two PCs.  

It wasn't long before the ethereal streams of white energy came into the cave, drawn here via magical means, no doubt, and energized Varker's short sword, Thurberus' brass key he'd kept from The Venturan colony ship where they were originally imprisoned, and H'ork chose the severed hand of Zerlin... for some weird reason.  I rolled randomly, and the soul of the sorcerer Zoffestry went into the hand (which seemed fitting).  H'ork and his new sorcerer-hand companion began communicating, hoping to create some kind of odd familiar relationship a la The Addams Family.

Rejoining Tinker, the PCs + Varker walked elsewhere in Skra'ath, hoping to taste that wine supposedly superior to all others in the region.  They ran into 4 bandits mugging a couple of fancy dressed wine connoisseurs.  The PCs took care of the muggers, looted their bodies, and stole the victims' gold and shoes before moving onwards toward that supposedly irresistible wine.

That's where we left things.  When we pick-up in just a week (this schedule is unusual because I'll be gone on a family vacation in a couple weeks), the PCs will finish exploring Skra'ath Cavern, and then we'll see what happens with the PCs on Cha'alt-prime.

There's also a chance that a new player joins us this coming Saturday.  Tentacles crossed!

Enjoy,

VS

p.s. Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  Want to join the Kort'thalis mailing list to stay up-to-date on what's going on in the skinematic Vengerverse?  This is it!!  Last but not least, I'm organizing a based-as-fuck RPG convention in Madison, WI this July (Sandy Petersen will be joining us as VENGER CON's Guest of Honor).  Grab your weekend badge for VENGER CON IV: Post-Modern Apocalypse!!!

"Black Pyramid Scheme" - CHA'ALT 3.9

 

It would have been nearly impossible to surpass our last session, truly a "banger," as the kids say.  But I think session nine in the Cha'alt campaign's third year came close to equaling it.  

A slight switch-up in the PC roster saw us with Bandersnatch, Thurberus, Botserdomus, and Tinker.  Since H'ork wasn't with us, and it took awhile to finish the narrative thread with confronting Simon, I decided against hopping over to the purple dimension of Cha'alt - this time.  

The party's half-orc warrior seemed to be more center stage in the purple world, and I wanted to close-out Simon.  But that doesn't mean there wasn't inter-dimensional shenanigans... because there were.  

The Crimson Bastards + purple Bandersnatch were about to leave The Black Pyramid room of Thoth-A'amon.  Bela'ak, the half-demon, half dark-elf vigilante found a cloak of disguise from the sorcerer-priest's armoire, donned it, and became Thoth-A'amon, at least in likeness.  Bela'ak decided he would rule in place of his dead nemesis, influencing if not outright controlling the 8-or-so room domain known in this place as a Docho.

Thurberus saw it as a sort of death and resurrection "rebirth" of Thoth-A'amon, straight out of myth.  Tinker warned Bela'ak not to get too corrupted by the power he will no doubt attain.  The dark-red and purple Bela'ak assured the pixie-fairy that, given his heritage, he shouldn't have a problem with that.  ;)

But the adventurers will always be welcome in Thoth-A'amon's Docho, and the next time they reappeared, they'd be welcomed with a bountiful feast.

Soon enough, the PCs found themselves in a room of white-robed cultists waiting for their time to be devoured by the godlike Zarga'an in a neighboring room.  After considerable banter, the PCs took a sample of the soporific wine (not from the neck-penis of a sandworm, but Zarga'anian piss that tasted like Miller High-Life) and decided to check out a chartreuse sphere of considerable energy.  

Bandersnatch the purple rashly grabbed it with both hands.  I requested a sort of combined saving throw and skill-check, which came up quite positive.  With only minimal damage inflicted, Bandersnatch communed with dread K'tulu and was given the knowledge that this sphere would grant magical blades a glyph of sharpness, making them vorpal (any crit with a vorpal weapon will decapitate the foe).

Bandersnatch felt the presence of another magical sword nearby.  Only having one enchanted blade currently in their possession, they slid the cursed obsidian dagger from a few sessions back into the chartreuse sphere.  Tinker decided to wrap a thin rope around it and use the sphere as a bola, knowing that touching it was hazardous to one's health.

Backtracking a bit, they entered the chamber of Zarga'an.  Bandersnatch went down and Tinker was wounded, but otherwise, the PCs felled the spawn of the Old Ones after a couple rounds.  Looting his room, they got a moonstone of true seeing (at least when it came to domination, possession, and that sort of thing), a massive drow sword named Arythaeldryn [slightly reskinned from The Islands of Purple-Haunted Putrescence] that was a +3 and +5 vs lawful and good-aligned beings that could control other magic swords, and Zarga'an's horn which would grant one person one wish per lifetime.

Tinker wished for hot girls looking to party, at least one for each of them - including a pixie-fairy sized one.  So, they partook of the flesh and got their +5 bonus.  Botserdomus wished for a pet banana-saurus which soon became possessed by the pixie-fairy's demon Nixor.  I must confess, aside from the name, I had little to no recollection of Nixor - I'll have to re-read my previous blog posts to familiarize myself with that.

The other two decided to hold-back their wishes as they returned to the cultists, telling them the bad news - Tinker wanting to quote Nietzsche "God is dead and it is we who killed him."  I rolled for the cultist's reaction.  They were despondent and on the brink of suicide.  Thurberus was at half-chub just hearing that news.  Reinvigorating their obsidian staff with a few souls, including the soul of Zarga'an himself, the priest took the rest as acolytes and they continued on.

Another room showed a half-dozen humanoids holding on for dear life as they were being sucked into the maw of some obscene, leviathan at the back of the room.  Tinker decided to swing his sphere so one of the humanoids could grasp it.  Thinking this could help him get out of this situation, he grabbed the sphere.  It shocked the bejesus out of him - chartreuse electrocution - which fused his hands to the sphere as he and the sphere were pulled in.  Bandersnatch used magic to teleport the sphere and Tinker into another room.  Meanwhile, both priests used their eldritch beam together, essentially crossing the streams.  

I decided to consult the wild magic side-effects table in Fuchsia Malaise, having each player roll a d100 to see what would happen.  One of them opened an orange portal - with an orange floating in space, casting judgement upon those it gazed upon with tangerine intent.  The other turned the Lovecraftian mouth-thing into a jack-in-the-box as it bobbed helplessly up and down.  Those inadvertently saved were grateful.

Two orange-peel PC dopplegangers exited the orange portal.  One was in the likeness of Thurberus, telling him not to ever give up the one ring - Singularum A'analus.  The other told him the opposite advice - destroy it before Singularum A'analus can destroy the entire party, perhaps Cha'alt itself.

Taking a different path, the PCs eventually found The Museum!  The bored and unhelpful curator told them there were three sections - the old wing, new exhibits, and weird art.  Searching the old wing first, they came upon a meteorite, a large high-tech ray gun, a red maple-leaf euthanasia booth, and two elves arguing over a ring on a pedestal and under a glass dome.  

The elf from a hairy-lime dimension wanted it as an engagement ring for his girlfriend.  The other, a blood-elf, just wanted the hairy-lime to not have it.  After listening to their conversation for a minute, the PCs decided to blast or stab the elves and take the ring for themselves.  Bandersnatch assumed Thurberus should wear the ring since those two orange dudes from the last room talked to Thurberus, which meant that he's probably the one who will need to wear it in the future.

One identify spell later... it's a greater ring of immunity - meaning that Thurberus was now immune to pretty much everything.  Someone tried stabbing him a minute later, and sure enough, he was immune.

Wandering over to the new exhibits, they saw a basalt bust of Cholak, their former patron demon.  Knocking it over so it broke, they continued on to find the hammer - it was a ban-hammer (I couldn't resist).  I mean, it makes sense since Simon is just the character of some teenager who cheated in order to become uber-powerful in Cha'alt, formerly the hyper-realistic immersive video game of the same name.

BTW, Karl filled the PCs in on Cha'alt's recent past, that it started as an immersive video game, and then became real, allowing the metaverse of infinite dimensions to also stop being computer simulations in favor of the real thing - this was called The Great Actualization.  Apparently, individuals who were inside Cha'alt's virtual reality were trapped here, unable to leave. 

The hammer could find anyone programed into it, so they asked it to locate Simon.  The hammer opened up a portal, and they went in.  It took them to the room where Ura'az-Vethune was ablaze with golden flame.  Simon was punching holes in The Black Pyramid - to the point where you could see daylight on the other side.  Such blasphemy was akin to someone taking out the crucifix from the Piss Christ art exhibit and shoving it up everyone's pee-hole.  Not cool, bro!

Before combat commenced, Simon monologued about how stupid Cha'alt was - banana-men, tentacled worms, scantily-clad women with oversized boobs and butts?  Was the idiot who made this place a 14 year old boy?  Simon was intent on remaking Cha'alt for "modern audiences."  That's right, this campaign setting would soon look like Disney had acquired the I.P.  Everything potentially offensive, over-sexualized, and edgelord would have to go.  The Black Pyramid with its nigrescent stone... racist, much?

If the PCs didn't want to fuck Simon's shit up before, they surely did now.  No one tries to Disney-fy Cha'alt and gets away with it.  As soon as Botsterdomus attacked Simon with the ban-hammer, he snapped his fingers, taking away the droid priest's legs.  He threw the hammer over to Thurberus who would be immune.  Simon needed to be dealt at least 100 points of damage from the ban-hammer before he was well and truly banned.  

Bandersnatch had a good idea - use his new sword that could command magical blades.  He ordered Simon's ultra-telluric sword to attack its owner, which it did.  From the damage of both, Simon was soon taken down - exploding in fragmented pixels.

At which time, several portals opened in short succession.  These dimensional gateways were from the fuchsia, puce, and banana Cha'alts.  Almost all of them arrived to tell Thurberus to destroy the one ring before it was too late.  His own puce self held a portable hole full of molten lava.  "Throw it in, hoss.  It's the only way."

However, Thurberus wasn't sure.  I mean, can you blame him?  The ring made him essentially invincible.  At first, Thurberus tried to swap-out his lesser ring of immunity (protecting him from blunt force trauma) for the greater ring, but his puce-self realized what was going on, reminding him that such tricks wouldn't work because "I'm you, hoss."

Then, Tinker-prime and fuchsia-Tinker both tried to steal the ring off Thurberus.  That attempt failed.  No one was quite sure if they had succeeded if they'd have worn the ring (and if so, which one... maybe they could have merged somehow?) or threw it into the lava themselves.

Eventually, the v'smm priest did the right thing.  He tossed the greater ring of immunity, Singularum A'analus, into the boiling-hot magma.  The other PCs from various dimensions left after telling Thurberus he did the right thing.  

And that's where we ended things.  BTW, just for the sake of posterity, keeping myself honest, and possibly helping my fellow GMs along the way, I frequently go back and forth between reading text I wrote during prep and speaking extemporaneously (either improvising or going-off from my notes).  Extemporaneous speech is always better, but sometimes, I'm afraid of missing something, forgetting details is easy to do, but on the other tentacle, reading is almost always less dynamic.  

And when you stumble on a word because you can't read your fucking hand-writing... well, that's just embarrassing.  That happened TWICE during this session, so I'm going to make a concerted effort to read "boxed text" less, so I sound less scripted.  I likened it to Luke at the Deathstar, turning off his targeting computer, and instead, just using the force.  Yeah, it can be more difficult, requiring a bigger commitment, but in the end, I believe it's worth it.  

That means preparing my session notes in a different way, more like bullet-point "tags" rather than full sentences written out.  I'll let you know how it goes. 

For reaching this milestone - plus, all the stuff that happened on the way, every PC gets three fuchsia stones of Divine Favor to use next session. 

Oh yeah, mere hours left to back my latest book(s) on kickstarter, namely Play Like A Fucking Boss + Fairy Dust.  Please back and share this project!    

As I've mentioned elsewhere, this game mechanic was cemented at Gary Con.  I've toyed with the foundations of it in our home Cha'alt game, and will be debuting it in actual play, as a player-facing mechanic, at our next game on Saturday, May 24th.

Enjoy,

VS

p.s. Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  Want to join the Kort'thalis mailing list to stay up-to-date on what's going on in the skinematic Vengerverse?  This is it!!  Last but not least, I'm organizing a based-as-fuck RPG convention in Madison, WI this July (Sandy Petersen will be joining us as VENGER CON's Guest of Honor).  Grab your weekend badge for VENGER CON IV: Post-Modern Apocalypse!!!

"She Cried Mauve!" - CHA'ALT Campaign 3.8

 

Another wild ride of a session that saw two distinct adventuring parties in parallel universes.  Lots of threads got tied together, exposition fell out of people's butts, and hilarity ensued!

Yes, that's a real "Like A Fucking Boss" desk name-plate.  It suits me and our Cha'alt game.

The "core 4" were in attendance... the half-orc warrior H'ork, Bandersnatch the blue-suede elf sorcerer, Thurberus the v'smm death-cult priest, and Tinker the pixie-fairy thief.  I banged the gong, and let the starting notes of southern darkness and desolation from Danzig's "Black Hell" play as I voiced the Cha'alt intro.  Now, it starts...

We began with the Purple Bastards in their purple Cha'alt dimension, except for the "normal" Bandersnatch who'd traded places with his dimension-brother last session.  After discussing what had happened, H'ork wasn't sure about this new not-purple sorcerer.  Realizing that his anti-purple bigotry might be a problem as the others wondered aloud just how much they could trust a stranger who looked and acted very much like their own Bandersnatch, but wasn't.  The sorcerer thought about entering the purple labyrinth just to see if it was possible to switch back, then the PCs heard and saw thunderous lightning coming from a cave up ahead.  That distracted them enough to temporarily put aside their reservations about adventuring with this non-purple "imposter."

Oh, I should also mention a few things before they checked-out that lightning storm cave - Bandersnatch (both of them) can nebulously feel the presence of the other.  Not enough to communicate, but they're vaguely aware of their counterpart.  

Another thing is Bandersnatch's turquoise helm.  The gift he received from Cholak, the PCs' patron who turned out to betray them.  It fractured during the fight with those giant slugs and broke apart when removed from the sorcerer's head.  The helm's purpose was to focus magical energy of the wearer, but its final task was to nullify the poison in his veins.

Last of all, I told the players to come up with at least one difference between their normal characters and their purple counterparts - H'ork is 1/4th crustacean, feistier, more chaotic, and an anti-purple bigot.  Bandersnatch has Tiny Danzig (see below), more chaos aligned with an eyepatch because one of his eyes was gouged in a knife fight.  Thurberus' mask was made of a purple metal and is magnetic, his suicide cult is more of a cargo cult based on this shake-weight device he carries with him - do you practice the mystic arts of tantric shake-weightism?"  Also, he's more benevolent.  Tinker can turn into a 2-inch earthworm instead of a full-blown sandworm.

Tinker checked-out the cave and saw Kurva'ak's sorcerer in meditation upon a prayer rug, lightning buzzing all around him.  Checking for traps, Tinker noticed a spherical shield of magic surrounding the sorcerer.  Bandersnatch cast dispel magic on it, Tinker went to backstab, H'ork sliced off his hand, and Thurberus (being a kinder, gentler priest) used his golden shield to body-check the sorcerer into the cave wall as he was running away while complaining that now he's only got one hand to masturbate with.

Getting knocked-out and tied-up, the PCs questioned him.  The sorcerer decided to switch sides and gave away the warlord's plan - Kurva'ak wants to use the plasma core to blow apart the gigantic stone doorway separating them from a Great Old One named Igg-Yig-Yatha'ak, also known as the dark effulgence.  Kurva'ak has an amulet with an ultra-telluric glyph upon it that has been "activated" or "attuned" in order to control that ancient god.  Although, the sorcerer (Zerlin) wasn't sure the ritual was correct - he was guestimating.  But if the amulet didn't help Kurva'ak control the Old One, his fallback plan was to let it ravage the desert as he and his men plundered, raped, and pillaged the settlements and cities devastated by the ensuing chaos

The cave was criss-crossed with veins of ulfire, a rare Cha'alt mineral.  Valuable stuff, if the PCs had a way of mining it.  Bandersnatch got himself a wand of lighting with 11 charges.  Zerlin was untied and stayed with the PCs in the background, in case his services were needed.

Moving on, they came to cave with deep jale cavities (another rare Cha'alt mineral) that somehow manifested a half-dozen dreamlike women of rare form.  Kurva'ak's mistress was also there, but she was a bitch - telling the PCs that they looked like flunkies and her warlord master would kick their ass if they didn't fall in line.  Both she and the PCs called for the guard who took Secra away, leaving the adventurers with the lovely dream women.  One of them led Thurberus to a discrete cave towards the back.  Luckily, Tinker flew behind at a distance to make sure the priest was alright.

Turns out, he wasn't.  That dream woman's skin hardened, cracked, and opened - revealing a slimy green humanoid thing underneath with tendrils that attached themselves to Thurberus and almost sucked the life out of him.  Tinker slashed at the tendrils, waking the priest up so he could take out his blaster and send that green slime thing back to Hell.  

Meanwhile, Bandersnatch and H'ork were watching the other girls put on a show... until Tinker ruined it with the unfortunate revelation that these girls were not what they seemed to be.  H'ork dispatched one or two and the rest fled.

Next, the PCs came to the main cave where Kurva'ak and his 9 minions were about to remotely trigger the plasma core to destroy the transdimensional door in the middle of the cave.  Bandersnatch used his psionic ability to disrupt the timing device.  That means someone would have to set it off by pushing the button themselves.  Bandersnatch himself volunteered, planning on tricking the warlord.

But the warlord anticipated that and sent one of his men to spy on the PCs as they left the cave system.  Sure enough, the PCs turned the plasma core off and placed it in the purple labyrinth as they said hi to their musician friend who'd finished with Purple African Child and was still working on Purple Haze With A Bit More Purple In It.

Once the spy saw this and told Kurva'ak, they came back to face these intruders.  As the feat implied, H'ork mowed them down with his sword.  "With a rebel yell," H'ork charged the warlord's minions.  That, of course, led to someone mentioning the Billy Idol song, and then I found it on YouTube and played it during the fight, but not before H'ork's player asking me if mauve was a type of purple, and I said it was.  "With a rebel yell... she cried mauve, mauve mauve!  In the midnight hour... she cried mauve, mauve, mauve - mauve, mauve, mauve!"  

Maybe you had to be there, but I laughed long and hard over that one, awarding him a purple stone for Divine Favor - why is it purple, rather than fuchsia, and what does that mean?  Well, as I'm thinking about it now, something purple will happen when he spends that point of Divine Favor.  Only time will tell exactly what's in store...

Also, purple-Bandersnatch named his little demon familiar Tiny Danzig, which also warranted Divine Favor, in my opinion.

Then it was time for a duel - just Kurva'ak vs the half-orc warrior.  Each hit for ridiculous amounts of damage - Kurva'ak had a sword of ulfire and another forged with jale and used them both against H'ork.  As the ultra-telluric blade's damage is tumescent, whenever Divine Favor was used, I allowed the player to role the potential future die (usually a d8) for additional exploding damage.  The half-orc was down to single-digit HP when his final massive strike decapitated the warlord.

Taking the amulet, they were still discussing what to do next when I thought this the appropriate time to pause the timeline happening in the purple dimension.  Restarting with the Crimson Bastards + purple-Snatch, the PCs realized they'd be much stronger if they got Ura'az-Vethun back from Simon... and then kill Simon because he's a dick and WAY too powerful to let him be.

They drove the RV for a couple hours before running into Karl, holding up a sign that said, "Hey, I'm Karl."  As the lore dictates, Karl was cloned many times over years ago and there's quite a few of them all over the place.  Asking Karl to pay with gas, grass, or ass, Karl started unbuttoning his pants when they told him to stop.  Their hitch-hiker friend talked about his dismal return on investment from a lemonade stand.  He didn't have any lemons or water, but didn't think that was a big enough hurdle to stop him.  Given the PCs' advice, Karl decided to acquire some lemons, feed them to a sandworm and get lemon-flavored worm wine, instead.

But it turns out, Karl had pipe-weed with him, he just thought the adventurers were talking about ordinary green grass.  Apparently, something strange happened with the cloning process when Karl stepped inside the booth.  It cloned a thousand of him, but they're all kind of dumbasses.

The additional 6 hours of driving went by quickly as the PCs passed-out and woke up right outside The Black Pyramid.   Upon entering, they read the circular room's parchment under glass - which I've read dozens of times over the last six years, and has prompted me to come up with a new one for the next time adventurers traverse The Black Pyramid... maybe it varies by dimension?

BTW, Tinker's player who's newest to the gaming group had never heard the spiel before, and I found his commentary after I'd finished reading to be priceless.  He said, "At no time during that entire thing did I know what was going to come next."  

In any case, they followed what they believed to be sand tracks up to a black triangular room.  And wouldn't you know, but a strangely color-shaped entity floated above the floor.  Tossing stones and blasting holes into it only created windows into forever.  The PCs gazed into it until they saw ultra-telluric glyphs (the encounter literally states that staring at it might impart ultra-telluric knowledge, so I took that, of course, as part of the prophecy).  

They learned that the ultra-telluric glyphs needed a special "translation activator and ritual" in order to use them, and that each glyph corresponded to a specific Great Old One (fun for the whole family, collect them all!).  Once the PCs had absorbed enough exposition, they noticed a secondary exit - a black portal that shone with some of the kaleidoscopic tones from the entity.  Believing that to be a better option than the standard door, they proceeded through the black portal.

They came to a black room with a coral-skinned elf with webbed hands and feet laying in the corner of the room, gutted like a fish.  The elf's blood pooled around him, quietly coagulating.  At the opposite corner was a banana-man rocking back and forth.  Upon approach, the banana-man (named Shento) told the PCs about the handsome man wearing beige robes who attacked and killed him, saying something about revenge.

When the PCs responded with conversation rather than violence, the banana-man opened up about what else he'd heard Simon monolog before the bloodshed started (though, Shento still doesn't know why he took revenge upon the coral-skinned elf).  Apparently, Simon is neither a New God nor one of their avatars.  He is, instead, a 16-year old who stole thousands of dollars from his parents to bribe a tech guy who used to work at the company that developed Cha'alt: The Immersive Computer Virtual Reality Game to make him the most OP, badass character on the entire server.

Before leaving to go to another room with the banana-man as "carrier of unnecessary items" or junk-humper, H'ork wanted to taste Shento's ripeness.  He ate his banana middle-finger knowing that for the next few weeks or even months, whenever he ate or drank something, it would have a banana under-taste.  Since the half-orc warrior loved bananas, he went ahead with it.  And lo, it was delicious.

In the next shiny, smooth, irregular, black room was a black trapezoidal altar at its center.  Driven into the altar was the magic sword they were looking for - Ura'az-Vethun, ablaze with golden flame.  A lone humanoid stood not 5-feet away, holding his arms in front of him.  The humanoid appeared to be a gilded statue.  Naturally, the PCs feared touching the sword.

As they were deciding what to do - whether it would be worth risking the life of an NPC to see if touching the sword surrounded by gold flame - a flash of outrageously puce light startled them as a small group of humanoids fell out of a portal.  These humanoids were very animated, agitated, and with a distinctly puce glaze.

It wasn't until they started giving the PCs direction that the Crimson Bastards realized the puce-hued individuals were themselves from yet another dimension.  "We don't have long to talk, so quickly tell us where you are in your timeline?"

After a smart remark by Tinker (I believe he asked what was currently happening in their timeline), The Puce Bastards told them about The Hive - Nexus, destabilization of the Federation, and a banana-shaped dildo shortage on Alpha Blue.  There wasn't a moment to lose, apparently, because the fate of the galaxy was in their hands - having mostly to do with the banana dildo thing.

Before leaving for their puce dimension... puchsia, is that a thing?  Hmm... Anyway, before leaving they told the PCs not to touch the golden flame, and they should go to The Museum within The Black Pyramid and look for a special hammer that could defeat Simon.

Vanishing from sight, but not before asking where they could find the museum, the PCs headed down more rooms, quickly moving through a room full of precog judges accusing a man of trading away an access crystal.  Eventually, they came to Thoth-A'amon.  In this room, he was being attended by a variety of servants and the place was full of hangers-on, clout seekers, sycophants, and cultists - Thurberus, eat your heart out!

Thoth-A'amon, of course, was the revenge target of the half dark-elf, half demon NPC Bela'ak whom they met a few sessions back.  Bela'ak asked the PCs to create a diversion.  The PCs were all too happy to distract the folks inside this room and Bela'ak, lavender light dancing in his eyes, slowly made his way up to the sorcerer-priest who rules this ocho... docho?  Yes, Docho, or 8-room realm or domain - could be 7 or 9, but traditionally 8, and routinely these Docho are used for immersive and hardcore training, learning, and military campaigns.  Yeah, I just made that shit up, FYI, but it sounds cool so that's a thing now.  

I gave Bela'ak Advantage on his attack roll with the obsidian magical staff because he'd been waiting for this moment for a long time.  And if he failed, I also planned on the dark-elf demon using his one-time (for certain, special NPCs) lavender demon-moon die of destiny to finish Thoth-A'amon off.  Turns out, I didn't need any of that.  My first roll was a natural-20.  Bela'ak got real close and said something like, "Thoth-A'amon, you killed those dear to me, and now I shall have my revenge - say 'ello to my little fren!"

Bela'ak blasted him center mass and Thoth-A'amon went up in flame and moments later that fire died to reveal nothing but ashes.  Having completed his chief objective, Bela'ak gave his obsidian staff away to Bandersnatch.  

I can't quite recall if we ended the session there or if they made it to the museum and then ended it.  Either way, that was it for the night.

Saturday, May 10th is our next session.  It's the day before Mother's Day, so hopefully that won't conflict with our gaming schedule.  Thanks for reading - I love comments, so comment, y'all!

Enjoy,

VS

p.s. Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  Want to join the Kort'thalis mailing list to stay up-to-date on what's going on in the skinematic Vengerverse?  This is it!!  Last but not least, I'm organizing a based-as-fuck RPG convention in Madison, WI this July (Sandy Peterson will be joining us as VENGER CON's Guest of Honor).  Grab your weekend badge for VENGER CON IV: Post-Modern Apocalypse!!!

"Through the Purple Glass" - CHA'ALT Campaign 3.7

 

Today, I offer you a very special session report from our Cha'alt campaign.  Year three, session seven, four players.  In this blog post, I'll describe our breaking the metaverse wall, among other weirdness.  Strap yourselves in for another wild ride, hoss.  

FYI, new Kickstarter launching the end of this coming week, so watch the blog for an announcement... soon!

The players are H'ork, Bandersnatch, Thurberus, and Tinker.  H'ork just reached 3rd level and so picked-out a new old-school feat from Cha'alt Ascended (now, included in Advanced Crimson Dragon Slayer).  He chose "mow them down" which allows him to immediately attack a nearby opponent after felling a previous opponent.  Tinker stayed 3rd level, but Bandersnatch (who now has an orange ooze as a familiar which he named Oozy Oozbourne) and Thurberus made it to 4th.

So, the PCs were still in the punishment dome - Thurberus had merged the purple and orange spheres.  I wanted a little time to decide how they responded, and stopped the session there last time.  Picking back up, I had the death-cultist's player roll his fate.

It was a 3, which meant the sphere became small like a marble, fuchsia in color, and attracted The Fuchsia Putrescence... distant cousin of The Purple Putrescence from the purple islands.  But they wouldn't realize that for a little while.  As it was, they went through a floor hatch into the next room of the punishment dome.

A blue and orange checkerboard floor pattern was easily circumvented with flight due to Tinker and the sorcerer's fly spell.  A bit anti-climatic, but realistic as the PCs didn't have their inhibitor collars on, like they would have if they'd gone through the punishment dome while The Venturan was still in flight back when they were little more than slaves.

After that was a room containing a stone altar and 4 keys were upon it.  Thurberus had the idea to touch the little fuchsia sphere to the keys after Tinker grabbed the 1st key and it shocked him.  He got an interesting response from the crystalline key, forcing his mind to reflect on past trauma - like remembering a time when his best friend had relations with his woman.  He handed the key to Bandersnatch which triggered a traumatic event from his past, as well - a triggering memory that I borrowed from the TV show Barry.  After the 2nd "not good" result, Thurberus smashed the crystal key on the floor.

The other two keys opened two separate doors.  One contained an antechamber with The Watcher inside.  The PCs talked to him for a bit.  As The Watcher gave them a choice between two doors - one led to the ultra-telluric glyph that was at the center of The Venturan, the oldest part of the ship.  The other led to an escape pod.  Since the colony ship had crashed into Cha'alt, the escape pod was obviously less valuable.  

Choosing the glyph, the adventurers found themselves in a weirdly angled room with a crystal monolith and a keyhole.  Since they had both keys, Thurberus tried the second key first, the one that opened that other door they never explored, but led to a black void.  A compartment opened that was lined with orange and purple velvet.  It contained a dagger.  As soon as Thurberus picked the dagger up, it compelled him to either stab himself or another person in the room - the doorway back to The Watcher was locked (nice try, hoss), so the death-cultist stabbed himself in the leg.  Then, he used his black robes to carefully remove the dagger and keep it for later.  

Trying the right key, another compartment opened.  This time pink and lime-green velvet and it contained a scroll where the ultra-telluric glyph was scrawled.  Taking that, the PCs left through a small porthole that exited out into the desert.  

Climbing down, they saw a gigantic spider carrying nearly a dozen Ka'alestinian jiha'adist-warriors to the right; they were heading towards the PCs' left - an open-air music festival where Aldous Sand was singing about being inside of you.  The adventures tried to warn the concert goers and prepared for battle.  Tinker took this opportunity to pick-pocket a member of the festival audience, but the tables were turned as his mark ended up pick-pocketing the pixie-fairy for 44 gp.

Throwing away a bunch of styrofoam the other day, I almost chucked a broken piece in the dumpster when it occurred to me that I could transform that bit into part of the crashed colony ship for a mass battle.  That's one of the things I was working on in the two weeks between sessions - that and covering my nearly full Cha'alt campaign bible notebook with demon flesh.

I pulled it out and used little d6s for the enemy combatants.  The battle didn't last long as H'ork swung Ura'az-Vethun with its tumescent damage dice, now with the ability to keep attacking once an opponent went down (as long as the next foe was nearby).  Between that and everyone else's might, half the jiha'adists were killed by round two - but then The Fuchsia Putrescence appeared just above them and would be completely overhead within the next minute or two.  Tinker transformed from pixie-fairy to giant sandworm and the other PCs road him off into the distance, away from The Venturan and the rest of the people who attempted to hide before The Fuchsia Putrescence tentacled them up into its waiting maw.

Assuming the putrescence was attracted to the small fuchsia sphere, Thurberus threw it in the sand next to the crashed colony ship.  The NPCs followed close behind Tinker-worm in their RV, eventually heading for the lair of Kurva'ak the warlord.  As they were getting the Hell out of there, the PCs passed Aldous Sand who was still in the process of running away.  They rescued him.

They drove a couple hours before nearly running out of gas.  By this time, it was nightfall, and someone had the idea of opening a portal to the purple labyrinth, which Bandersnatch did.  It took awhile, but once he traced the purple glyph of dreaming, the sorcerer began to form a purple crystal which would fuel the RV.

In the meantime, Tinker looked for desert life and found those Quecida insects that Cha'alt natives like to eat and Federation elite prefer to stick up their butts.  Grabbing a few, Tinker snuck behind H'ork who was relaxing and slipped one down the back of his trousers.  It was a pleasurable sensation.  Thurberus was lecturing his acolytes on the importance of self-sacrifice or something like that.

Opening the portal back up, Bandersnatch exited the purple labyrinth.  During these few minutes of downtime, I was racking my brain trying to come up with something different, something special about the purple labyrinth to set this experience inside of it apart from all the other times the PCs have gone through.  Perhaps it was that catchy tune by Infinite Sorrow?  Shortly before describing his return, it hit me... it me hard, hoss.  And I went for it like a man holding an empty vial of zoth over his mouth knowing that in the fullness of time, at least one drop upon his tongue.

The Cha'alt that Bandersnatch returned to had a subtle purple cast to it.  The sorcerer attributed this to spending so much time in the purple labyrinth and put it out of his mind.  Having the fuel they needed, they loaded up the RV and drove another half-hour or so before coming to weird colored lights off to the right.  They went right to investigate and found a depression containing a 20-foot wide, amorphous, rainbow slime.  Everyone but Bandersnatch was mesmerized by it, so he took a closer look and discovered the slime was actually some form of ooze-like crystal with a thousand facets constantly undulating.  The rainbow slime ate a large dragonfly and the PCs assumed it was hostile, but almost decided to destroy it just in case it was hiding some sort of treasure.

Before leaving, a caravan pulled up to the rainbow slime.  They had a weird rake and glass spheres where they scraped away a portion of the slime and captured it within the transparent orbs.  Apparently, decadent nobles and sorcerers liked to use these as house-lanterns as they can last up to 10 years, providing a kaleidoscopic ambiance that's second to none.

Tinker attempted to extort the caravan by pretending to work for the Department of Cha'alt Wildlife or something.  He got 19 gp and a bottle of worm wine out of the deal.

There were a couple more hints as to the purple strangeness that had befallen the party's sorcerer.  His ooze familiar tried to warn him that "you've been displaced."  But he wasn't sure what that meant.  Also, this Bandersnatch (purple-snatch) didn't recall the half-demon, half-dark-elf, Bela'ak, who'd been traveling with the PCs since the beginning of last session.  Well, that's strange.  What could this mean?  Speculation abounded.

Heading on, they eventually came to the entrance of the warlord's cave-system.  However, the entrance was clearly a massive demon's head and the cave mouth, the demon's mouth.  Leaving a photon torpedo near the cave entrance, the PCs jumped through, two of them being slightly wounded on the way in.  

Inside the first cave contained three massive guard-slugs.  Combat ensued, Bandersnatch led with a fireball that softened them up as the smell of scorched slug wafted through the cave.  H'ork used his ultra-telluric blade to kill one and wound another as the third shimmied his slug-butt down the larger of the two tunnels out of that area.

During that battle, Bandersnatch had almost died again, going into the red HP-wise.  His unconscious body convulsed until Thurberus healed him enough to wake up, though he was weakened, his vitality depleted.  

Stopping to rest for awhile before heading on, and with approximately 15 minutes of the session remaining, I paused what was happening here to go back to Bandersnatch's exiting the purple labyrinth (again).

As Bandersnatch exited the purple labyrinth, everything had a distinct lack of purple to it, from the sorcerer's perspective.  But everyone in this Cha'alt world where he now was, considered Bandersnatch himself to be slightly purple in appearance... or was it just his appearance?

Revealing what had happened for those still confused, the original Bandersnatch stepped sideways into a parallel universe where 99% of things were the same except that this new Cha'alt dimension was subtly saturated in purple and the PCs hadn't met Bela'ak.  Also, it's unclear if the purple bastards (as opposed to the crimson bastards) have ever encountered Simon.

But the original Cha'alt PCs were about to create another divergence in the dimension-line as Simon appeared.  Snapping his fingers, the giga-chad (even his flaws are perfect) disappeared H'ork's arms after the half-orc attempted to skewer the strange humanoid.  Then, Simon turned his attention to Thurberus, telling him of a new way of religious worship, the silent prayer.  Another finger-snap and the death-cultist's mouth disappeared.  Taking Ura'az-Vethun, Simon told the PCs he was late for an important appointment (note to self: never try to say that out loud again).  His last snap caused him to disappear.

Bela'az stepped-out of the RV to say "I think that was one of the New Gods... or one of their avatars," which is probably what the players were thinking (see year two of the Cha'alt campaign).  But I'm sure that at least some of the adventurers are skeptical enough to doubt that's all there is to Simon.

So, I pulled the purple rabbit out of the hat and now we have to discuss the purple elephant in the room... two adventuring parties in two different Cha'alts at the same time.  WTF?  Quickly followed by, how am I going to navigate that from a game perspective?  Well, I have a couple weeks to figure that out.  The easy thing to do would be to quickly snap them back together or make one go away and simply focus on a singular and linear dimension... but where's the fun in that?

The only funny and/or poignant lines I remembered to write down were "This gives new meaning to the phrase 'The gloves are coming off'."  Tinker was referring to the gloves Thurberus (or anyone) might wear when wielding that cursed dagger.  Because once you take off the gloves, you have to either stab someone nearby or yourself.  That led to a comparison of Michael Jackson's glove and my saying "Moonwalk, moonwalk, stab!"

The other was prompted by Aldous Sand (just curious, does everyone see what I did there... Aldous Snow, John Snow - because he's a bastard it's customary to take the last name of your immediate environment, in desert regions it's Sand, so that's why it's Aldous Sand) volunteering to spend a considerable amount of time in the purple labyrinth.  The PCs wanted him in there to check to see if anything weird was happing.  Answer:  Yes. Yes, there was.  

Aside from the purple-snatch displacement, there were a series of cha'altquakes rumbling the labyrinth purple.  Aldous agreed to go because it would give him ample time to work on his next hit single.  Apparently, he's just about perfected "Purple African Child."  Still working out the solo, though.

Did you like this session report?  Do you have any questions?  Can anyone hear me?  If so, comment below.

Enjoy,

VS

p.s. Want the hardcover Cha'alt trilogy?  Here's how (and they're currently on sale!)!!  Want to join the Kort'thalis mailing list to stay up-to-date on what's going on in the skinematic Vengerverse?  This is it!!  Last but not least, I'm organizing a based-as-fuck RPG convention in Madison, WI this July (Sandy Peterson will be joining us as VENGER CON's Guest of Honor).  Grab your weekend badge for VENGER CON IV: Post-Modern Apocalypse!!!